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Sunday, March 11, 2012

Spring is coming to the Grommet Line

Up here in Flusherville, you know Spring is right around the corner when the whining, earbursting sounds of Skidoos are replaced with the blatting, earbursting noise of the red-necks' Harleys.

And today, I heard the first bratt of the Springtime Harley loud and clear, like a rubbie with an empty stomach burping in an alleyway. It's music to my ears!

I wouldn't mind the small penis replacers thunderous motorcycles if jerkface across the street didn't give it full throttle outside my window at 5:35 in the morning for six months of the year.

Maybe what I should do is take an icepick to the muffler on my vintage (if rusty) '84 Toyota Tercel and give it full revs in his driveway at about three in the morning.

Breakfast-time comes early here at Flusher Ranch, when you have to get your ass out to North American Veeblefetzer for 7:00am and start cranking out size 7 grommets.

But really, 5:35 AM is just rude. It's barf on the buffet rude. It's hit on the bride's sister rude. It's tell the kid selling chocolate bars at the door after supper to support his nineteeth-place hockey team that you think his Mom in the car out on the street watching him is a MILF rude.

I'm glad to say I have done only one-to-two of the rude things listed above.

That's the Royal Flusher Way.

Spring.

Oh Spring...

Spring with its offers from Vegas. They are beckoning me like a $22 a BJ whore in one of the newer 'fast' elevators at Fitzgeralds.

'Hey honey... how about some $22 action???' they beckon.

We've gotten some real beauties on the back of the heavy play Mrs. Flusher did while I was out of Vegas and at the Grey Cup in Vancouver.

The best one is from the Four Queens and it includes a shitload of freeplay and all your food - including one din-din for two at Hugo's and room service. With room service, free, sweet room service, I could eat breakfast in my room and have more time for GAMBLING.

I feel myself weakening, and my Spring spring is springing. Oh yes, I have a hard-on for Vegas.

After sooooo many months from our last trip, through the long hard-off winter, and the hard-'keep-warm' I had for Vegas around mid January, and the couple weeks of hard-perky for Vegas I had around Groundhog day, I am now in full-throttle give-it-to-me-now-baby mode - I need to get to five quarter Mecca FAST.





Saturday, March 3, 2012

www.royalflusher.com is back!

Exciting news for you degenerate but savvy readers of the goings-on here in Las Vegas the Royal Flusher Way!

Some time ago - a number of years, in fact - I let my registration of my domain name lapse. Well, someone out there knows a winning domain when they see one and it was quickly snapped up. It didn't take them long to put up a thoroughly engaging website which read 'coming soon...'.

Year after year I waited to see if anything would happen with it, and at re-registration time, I waited day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute until the deadline, hoping beyond hope that someone else would fuck up like I did and I'd be able to get it back.

After actually about 4 years - maybe 5?... (when you are in domain depression the years just roll by like marbles down a plank - whatever that means) - it happened. The domain was not renewed and Jimmy Poon snaffled it back.

So www.royalflusher.com is back where it should be - in my somewhat capable hands, and right now, pointing to this here blog.

When you get the urge to read up on the hilarious yet trivial exploits of moi, all you need do is remember www.royalflusher.com.

If you type it in, it's a full 5 keystrokes shorter than www.royalflushervegas.com! Now that's what I call customer service - because on this blog, I do it all for you, the degenerate (but savvy) readership of Las Vegas the Royal Flusher Way!