RSS findIndex trimsentences createcard

gridCSS

AdCode

createItems and other JavaScript code

Item Render Code


Wednesday, November 6, 2013

The Trip Report That Wasn't - Part VII

I should mention the wonderful couple of hours I spent with Blonde4Ever's crew at the Hennessey a few days back, where we had a big meet-up/drink-up. You guys are great and I am lucky to be allowed in your company.

I spent some time talking to Eva from Germany who regaled me with stories of playing for 4 hours on penny slots... one penny at a time. This kind of perverted action has me champing at the bit to lower my stakes and really get frugal. God love ya Eva and Wolfgang.

Dewey showed up there so of course I had to take a Selfie with the two of us getting as close as a couple of Western (RIP) bedbugs.

The last full day in Vegas was Friday, and we were shipping out Saturday around noon on Air FU Canada's new 'Rouge' service.

Now as far as I know, a rouge is a single point, scored when you kick the football through the endzone. Maybe Air FU Canada's new service is worth a single point as well.

After all, they have cut back the aeroplan miles granted on flights to what I thought was a bare minimum - 25% of miles traveled for the cheapest ticket.

So instead of getting a few thousand points for the trip out, I got like 970.

And on the return trip, on Rouge, what do I get?

100 points.

On a $900 ticket, return. That's why I call it Air Fuck You Canada.

100 stinking aero-miles for a $900 ticket.

But my bitterness preceeds me...

We got up early on Saturday morning. We hammered the quarter Bonus Poker at the Nugget for a couple of hours, hoping for a last-ditch Royal. Not happening. I dumped $100 or more there.

Breakfast? The Cal.

We wandered over and the 50 cent Bonus Poker royal STILL had not been hit. It was up to $3700.

We went at it for a while - and I lost and lost some more. Like $200. Breakfast went quickly at the coffee shop, and then one last bash at it.

I couldn't hit a damn thing.

It was time to get packed up. And time to see the host. They comped half the cost of the corner Rush tower suite leaving us with a bill of $500 for six days. Not bad.

As a last bash, we tried the $50 9/6 Jacks. I finally managed to find some luck, hitting a few hands and drawing to a flush. I put in $100 and cashed out $300. This felt like a win to me.


We caught the limo to the airport and went through security. I was short a Royal and had not had a straight flush all trip. But there was always the airport slots.

I went at Triple Double Bonus like a man possessed, hoping for Aces Kicker for $1000 or a Royal for $1000.

Neither hands showed up but I did finally get my straight flush. And a few quads.




For you nay-sayers who say I cook the books and fake the result... screw you.

Here are the facts.

Royal Flusher:  -$2000
Quad Queen: +$1200

Comps - well she had 6 nights at the Four Queens and 6 at the Cal and 3 at the Nugget. We paid for the other 3.

So 15x$50 a night or even $40 a night: $600 in rooms.

Meals, all covered except 3 x Magnolias and half of Chart House: $300 for Quad Queen solo plus $800 while I was there (includes half of Chart House and $100 Triple George comp) = $1100.

Free play: $120

So comps, $1220

Again, I think the comps outweighed the losses. But we also tipped about $400 for drinks and $200 for food. Maybe/probably more.

Out of pocket, it's $900 flight + $800 loss + expenses of maybe $700. Call it $2400 or $2500 for 28 person-days in Vegas.

This is my personal worst losing trip in 47 trips.

I'm never going back to Vegas again.

I am done with gambling.

I am done with video poker.

I will never, ever, jump a motorcycle again.

And with that, see you next time from Las Vegas, the Royal Flusher Way.

R.F.

Thank you for Losing with us on Air FU Canada Rouge! Visit Las Vegas again and earn another 100 aero-miles!
Actually, I took this because I thought she was pretty cute. Rouge is doing at least one thing right. Bon Voyage!




Monday, November 4, 2013

The Trip Report That Wasn't - Part VI

Mrs. Flusher had been in Vegas for 18 days and 20 nights, and I'd been there 10 days and 7 nights. So call it 28 person-days.

Yes, I'm working on spinning the math already. But first... HOW TO SAVE MONEY IN THE CASINO:

How to save money in the casino.
This cute couple in the Four Queens were sticking it to the man with their own deck of complimentary The D cards and comped drinks. Now that's showin' 'em.

We really hit it hard on the last full day and the Quad Queen was in fine form, really living up to her name. Meanwhile, I went into total quad drought starting the night before - that would be Thursday night. I was poised to have a break-even trip if I could hit a $1000 hand...

...but the quads weren't coming.

One other thing that has always given me trouble is straights flush - and sure enough, I had had none - zero - this trip. I suspect I need to train in this area. I'm probably missing straight flush holds.

I was down about a grand and the Quad Queen was actually up a few hundred after all that time.

It seemed that I could not hit much. That's because, in retrospect, I did not hit much. I knew, somehow, Friday would be better right? And I'd had the keno hit to take me close to even.

Well, within $600 of even.

Well, Friday was interesting because two things happened. 1) the Quad Queen came into her own pounding out the quads like nobody's business. and 2) I tripped and fell flat in a stinking turd-puddle of bad luck.

Oh my God how I tried, tried, tried to get something going. I hit one quad in the morning, but mostly lost. Meanwhile, Mrs. Flusher stung the Smug Nugget for dealt Aces and a few other beauties.

We went to the Four Queens Mike's Bar to play our November freeplay and I ended up dumping $240 at the bar. Now, when Mrs. Flusher needed to use the Loo, and had me play on her machine for her, yes, I got one of my 3 quads for the day on her machine.

The Quad Queen and I dined at the Chart House, primarily because I had a mac and cheese hard-on for their deep fried mac and cheese.

Here are some of her hits from that day.









Some of what you are seeing here - the Quad Queen hit four Aces four times in one day. Once on quarters (dealt) and three times on 50 cents (one dealt). In fact, two of the Aces hits on 50 cents came 5 minutes apart.

Why should you believe me?

Because I was there and I saw it with my very ownsome rheumy flushie-eyes.

The night of the last full day the 50 cent Bonus Poker progressive at the Cal was up to $3300 for the Royal. So we figured that was worthy of a full court video poker press. We went after that sucker.

We went after it until our fingers bled and our bowels turned to water and we had no more urge to play video poker ever again.

We did not get it. The tally for the day was:

Quad Queen: 14 quads
Royal Flusher: 2 quads, plus one quad hit while playing on the Quad Queen's machine while she peed.

Yeah, it was like that.

By the end of the day she was up about a grand and I was down maybe $1700 or $1800.

Dinner at the Chart House at the Smug Nugget. Prime Rib, Crab, the as-mentioned deep fried Mac and Cheese (OMG)...

I spent a lot of time observing the amazing wildlife at the Chart House.


Here comes the Mac and Cheese.
And up goes my weight.

Feeling crabby?
By the end of Friday I was realizing that I wasn't going to have a very good trip. It all went in the dumper in 24 hours. Fortunately, the Quad Queen was balancing me.

And what the hell, I had fun. A LOT of fun. We'd played all over downtown. I'd met up with VPSue at the Boar's Head for a wonderful cigar - I think it was called a Macarena - and more losing VP and winning Absolute rocks for me served by Kelly. (VPSue hit 3 quads while I lost beside her, and got a $5 scratch card to boot.)

And there was always the early morning hours the next day before the limo to the airport - and the airport itself.




Friday, November 1, 2013

The Trip Report That Wasn't - Part V

As far as today goes, the Quad Queen has been on a tear, hitting eleven quads so far plus a dealt straight flush on 100 play pennies. That paid $400.
She's had Aces on Bonus Poker four times - three of them dealt. And three of the Aces were on 50 cent BP.

On the trip, she is up two or three hundred - no mean feat after 16 days here.

And meanwhile I'm down about a grand - nothing a Royal couldn't fix...

Hmmm... and it's the first day of November. That means we have some free play at the Four Queens available....

We'll see.








Best costume of the night?

Scuba diver.

 


The Trip Report That Wasn't - Part IV

Well, we've been hammering the video poker here in Vegas and enjoyed Hallowe'en.



First the bad news... I'm losing.

Second, the WORSE news... the fine folks at the Downtown Grand that I have come to fall in love with... have chosen to go through and downgrade paytable after paytable on their video poker - specifically the Double Double Bonus progressive.

It's now 7/5. With the same progressive at the Four Queens on three bars with a 9/6 paytable!!!, you can decide for yourself which is the better gamble.

I don't know why they would do this 3 days after opening - it seems to me that it would work against the goodwill they are trying to generate with their new clientele, such as yours truly.

And there was some spooky Keno magic going on...

Jurassic Vegas, carefully and lovingly posed for.
The Quad Queen dressed up as a savvy gambler. I dressed up as a degenerate gambler (i.e. wore my usual street clothes). A couple of people gave me spare change.

Here are some brief highlights of the trip...

No more Royals yet, but some interesting developments.

I had two bad days back to back: -$600 on each of them. So yesterday we played some Keno tickets at the Nugget.

One one I had five spots marked, 20 games, buck a game. The Keno Lady told me in her own broken-English-Kenospeak that I should play $1.25 for that, much better. So I did.

The Keno channel in the room isn't working so after a while I hung out in the lounge and watched the last few games. I actually napped a while after having had a kind of rough night the night before. I blame the cocktail waitress at the Cal who foolishly - FOOLISHLY!!! - brought me exactly what I asked for each and every time.

Oh well.

Anyhoo... the Exuberant Keno Savant broken-English-Kenospeak lady keeps coming over and high fiving me and hugging me and talking about the tip I'd promised her if I won (which I did promise...)

Long story short:


I gave her a $65 tip.

Why?

Because the dollar a game version would have paid off only $700. The dollar and a quarter version she insisted I play instead paid off $400 more.

She gave me some more mumbo jumbo about being able to feel which tickets were going to win. She talked about possible future wins and that we should play again, and also about future tips which we should leave at the desk. She looked like turpentine and smelled like India Ink.

Here are some shots from the last few days. Gotta love Hallowe'en downtown.