A Few Bites From the Queen's Plate

Day 2 - part 4

I returned to the high limit room at Luxor where what I had figured was the best possible game for a man of my extremely limited budget and even more extremely limited talent lie waiting - 9/5 Jacks or Better, on Spin Poker.

I'd recently found that you can play Spin Poker on a single line at a time with full coin in, even though the game is geared for as many as 9 lines of action at a shot.

The only problem with this is that you might see a winning hand on a line other than the one you are playing - and that you don't get paid for. This can lead to some degree of eyebrow lifting, tut-tutting, general consternation, and the emitting of a streak of blue language that insults all manner of the animal kingdom, doing all kinds of immoral things and unlubricated activities with body parts and objects, and scorches the general area into a smoldering crater.

Still, I remained disciplined, and dialed up the remaining $40 of my Luxor free play, and also twenty bucks of my own (to get the free play moving).

I had a mission to accomplish - get the first quad of the trip, win some money, and of course, get a Royal if at all possible.

After playing through the freeplay, I had $70 on the meter - I thought this was a pretty good result and a decent sum with which to engage the big bad casino.

As I was playing my single line quarter game, I noticed a fellow next to me playing Super Times Pay triple play Deuces. On Dollars. He had about $1500 on the meter. He seemed very focused and I didn't make much in the way of small talk, except once when he got exactly nothing on all three lines of a 10x multiplier.

"Sucks to be you, eh?" I said, demonstrating deep concern for a fellow playah.

"Get bent."

I played on. And on. And on. After half an hour, I was drained, and I still had not had my first quad of the trip. Rather odd, I thought.

I'd been a good little scrounger all day long, so I gambled $20 more. It went well for a while, and after seeing a quad on a non-paying line, I bit the bone and switched up to three lines at a time.

Surely this would result in a quad?

My stake built up nicely, but even a half an hour of triple play did not result in anything else but my credits going to zero.

I'd played the equivalent of two and a half hours of single line Jacks without getting a quad. I should have had 2-3 in that time. But, as my buddy Kevin says, in video poker, anything can happen in the short term.

If it was any consolation, the guy beside me had burned through $1500 on his meter. And had dumped in $500 or $600 more. A worthy price to make me feel marginally savvier.

I sulked up to my room, got some ice, and poured myself a stiff vodka. Not this again! Quad drought, again. And right at the start of the trip, again.

I looked around the room for something to distract me and found a card with a cryptic message to decipher. I spent some two happy minutes working on the vexing puzzle.

Thank you for servicing me, Rnmnmmnnvvv-------.

It was great to know that I'd enjoyed the personal services of the person named Rnmnmmnnvvv-------.

The big hand says its Cocktail O'Clock.

I had another stiff belt and took a look around Luxor. I didn't look at the pool, because I'd looked at it earlier. It still irks me that they sell premium VIP access to part of the pool - presumably the part that they clean regularly.

Hunger rumbled south of my border, so I made my way to the More buffet for feed-trough visit number three of the day. My $43 buffet pass was paying off big-time.

Never, never, never expect anything from a buffet 'steak'. 

It was steak night, and co-incidentally, the night they make room for the 'faster' horses at Las Vegas Downs Raceway and Meat Packing.

(Savvy reader fasteddiec wonders if those are jockey whip marks on the meat.)

After chewing down a few bites from the Queen's plate, I tried the short ribs. They were just this side of awful. I was 0 for 2 on the entree department.

I went for some salad and crab legs. Cold, fishy, salty. Ugh.

I stalked the buffet steam tables, up and down, up and down. Each of the dishes were trying to look pretty, like a girl at a grade 7 dance. Pick me! Pick me!

Ummm, no, the only thing left to pick was my teeth. More does a better buffet job when it ain't dinner.

Obviously, something went into my gullet to fill the gap. I might have had a dessert or something. Certainly, there are no more damning photographs, so let's pat our stomachs and call it a day, shall we?

I went and tried one last $20 bill at this and that and got nowhere. After a long, very hot day, with lots of exercise, post-travel aches, a short crappy night of sleep, and no quads, I was tired and cranky. I was alone, except for the afterburn of my friend Flicka, who was making a run for the small intestine. In deference to my equine buddy, I hit the hay, as it were.

A busy day in Las Vegas!

A big, big day was in the offing tomorrow - I'd do the pilgrimage back to the airport environs, whereupon I would pick up something that would make a big difference in my agenda - an Intermediate-sized Chevrolet Cruze or similar, with which to bomb around the valley.

Day: -$70
Trip: -$100
Bankroll left: $900

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The $1K Scrounge Trip - June 2016: All Posts

Planning the $1K Scrounge Trip - June 2016

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