Friday, June 2, 2017

Mayonnaise Kisses





Day 1 - Tuesday May 16, 2017 - continued.

A savvy gambler does what it takes to get quad 6s and that's just what I did at the Tropicana Las Vegas bar. I was on my way!

I parlayed to 50 cents and played it into the ground. Got a second decent drink for my efforts.

The booze was making itself known in my bloodstream, and all of a sudden I was crazy hungry. I'd made due with wolfing down disk-shaped stacked foods all day, so I went to see what the little walk up counter at the South Beach Food Court had.

Pizza! Yes!

Ugh.

Pizza. No.

When in doubt, or at the top of a large mountain, do the right thing - order a cheeseburger. I did, and didn't expect much. But it would fill the gap, and I really, really wanted to just hit the hay.

While waiting for said cheeseburger, I investigated and perused the South Beach Food Court's Copiuous Condiments Rack.

Nothing like a few gallons o' Condiments.
I took a close inspection of the Heinz brand vat o' Mayonnaise and noticed a delightful little inverted hershey's mayonnaise kiss hanging from the spout. This was not your mother's tiny half jar of three year old mayonnaise with the hard, dark yellow crust around the edges.

This was a mayonnaise nipple making machine!

Somehow or other a cheeseburger appeared, piping hot, and looking... a bit oozy, but cheddar on a burger will do that every time. It gets sort of see through and sweaty and sticky - like a stripper's g-string. Putting that thought out of my head (and so should you), I addressed the cheeseburger.

"Hello, cheeseburger."

Then I dressed the cheeseburger with a series of Hershey's Heinz Mayonnaise Nipple Kisses.

It wasn't as bad as it looks - I added ketchup and mustard too, to round it out.

It turned out that the cheeseburger was giggly happy-tongue good, just tastebud explodingly delicious. OMG I enjoyed that sloppy messy nipply cheeseburger!

Wiping my chin, I checked the time and cleared away my cheese-detritus. And being a reasonable person, fairly mature, I thought, hey it's like 5:00am my time, I should head to bed, so I walked across the casino and saw Beefalloo, so I had to play that too, right?





What the hell, I managed an $82.85 bonus! Sweet! I was up on the trip!!! I could go to bed happy, so I cashed out, and saw my old friend, the 50 play nickel video poker machine.

A few hands wouldn't hurt, right? I played 5 at a time on nickels.

I got my first Four Pointies of the trip! Maybe Pointies would be lucky for me! I upped the stakes to 10 hands, but ended up giving back most of my dough.

I forced myself to cash out with $5.00 profit, and thus, ensured a winning day, something that has been rare for me in the past 18 months.

By the time I hit the hay (and then went to bed) it was 5:30am my time. I was happy, exhausted, and had dreams of mayonnaise and large hairy mammals.
A nice win of five whole dollars on Day 1!

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