JetBlue Mint to Vegas

Day 1 part 2 Let's cut to the chase, all the marketing hype aside, JetBlue did not give me even one single mint. Not even a linty Tic Tac from the left pocket of my Sunday pants.

Why are they missing what has to be the most obvious thing to give away in Mint class? Pepper, Spear, or Establish, any kind of mint will do.

But the rest of the trip was great!

Boarding was a dream. I basically just strolled on with the other minties. I couldn't wait to cocoon myself in my double-windowed lie-flat seat!

It is quite a system, almost an Apollo YoLeven style capsule space cadet command cockpit, with all kinds of storage for complimentary water and other of your gear, a big(-ish) touchscreen TV console with remote, and headphones for listening with, and a lie-flat seat configuration console.

They'd put a sleeping kit on my seat along with an amenity kit. The sleeping thiny includes a pillow and a sort of blankie/sleeping bag thing. Ok, it's a blankie.

The Amenity kit is nice enough, I guess. It certainly had plenty of amenities. The star of the kit has to be the mint socks.

Included: 'Feel good' branding wrapper, zippered carrying bag, Mint branded socks, Fancified Dr. Dennis hand cream, mouthwash, and lip balm. Better choice than those discounted Doc Johnson products I've seen cropping up on eBay, I guess. Tuft and Needle eye plugs, Dr. Dennis 2 part face stripper.

Missing: Mints of any kind, Doc Johnson 'After Party' toothbrush.

I was offered a pre-flight drink and of course accepted. Camalee (or was it Lyla?) brought me a Woodford Reserve on the rocks, served in a very light, unstable, small bottomed, defective, unusable, accident prone plastic cup.

Sipping the Woodford, I surveyed my surroundings, trying to figure out all the nooks, crannies, buttons, and knobs without appearing fidgity.

Doors closed, pushback imminently, Lyla (or was it Camalee) insisted that my small personal item (ahem) which is quite heavy as it contains my Chromebook, my CPAP, and all the other things I need to survive.

These things happen to me and I think at the time, "Nobody - NOBODY - has to know about this."

As I lifted the bag to Camalyla, yes, of course, the Woodford got dumped on the passenger next to me. Fuck.

I felt like such an ASS. And I'd wasted good bourbon. Camalyla was very fast to clean things up. I looked the poor fellow in the eye and apologized with all sincerity.

"Dude - I am so, so sorry that Camalyla dumped my drink down your pant leg."

And you know what this meant, right?

I had relinquished all rights to accessing the washroom. I would not be allowed to disturb this poor dripping wet bastard in any way for the next 5 hours.

We took off on time and dinner production ensued. Man, the cabin smelled good! The menu was 'small plates'. You could choose up to 3 of 4.

Easy. I took the 3 that were not salad.

The food was excellent, although two of the three dishes weren't very hot. The pasta was absolutely delicious though, piping hot, and spicy.

I felt Royally Royal as I (very, very carefully) ploughed through all my food. I even ordered a replacement Woodford, in a fleeting moment of overconfidence. This one, I would not spill.

Dessert was Tiramisu. Excellent.

The rest of the flight was just chill out time. I stretched out a bit. Watched an episode of Below Deck. Stretched out a little more. And a little more.

Should have taken my shoes off - the little footy-foot compartment is a little cramped when lie-flat mode is engaged.

It felt so good to be able to lie down and nap. It had been a long day and by midnight, my bod was complaining.

We arrived on time at 2:00 am. I was hoping for a swift transition to my lodgings in my luxury rented automobile. That was not to happen.

I found the rental car facility shuttle. And waited. And waited. It took forever for a bus to appear and another forever and a half for the stupid bus to finally depart, all the while playing an annoying 60 second clip on loop - a portion of the annoying 4 minute presentation normally on loop. Did you know that with Ace rent-a-car, you don't have to go into the rental facility building? I learned that - 47 times.

Normally, the Avis app notifies me that my car is available and let's me choose. As an Avis Preferred member, I can simply walk to the car I've chosen, get in, and drive away. Not this time. No cars available for the choosing.

So I shlepped to the Avis Preferred booth and I'll cut to the chase. They had no cars. They offered an Escalade but it would be $26 a day more. I called bullshit on that.

Trying to keep in the good graces of the boothlings, I pretended to cry and in anguish, pounded the counter while shouting, "But I prepaid!!! I... Pre... PAID....".

I could take an electric car, but I'd have to go up to the main counter. I called double bullshit on that. There had to be a solution. The boothlings stared intently at the computer, mumbling and fussing.

This was not royally at all. This was royally fucked.

(Hope I didn't use that one too early in the trip.)

Behold, my luxury rental automobile:

Whatever. It drove fine and got me to my luxurious royal accomodations.

All I can say is I am incredibly thankful that the key system on my phone worked first time, and I was able to get into my room at Excalibur without any drama.

(I would have booked Luxor, but it would have costed $300 more for the Saturday night. Excalibur was resort fee only, $30 Freeplay and $100 buffet play).

Wanna see a hotel room? Sure you do. Newly remodeled. Gah!

It was 4:30 in the morning. Late enough to be early the next day. I did not go to the casino. I did not gamble. I went to bed.

Day 1 Win/Loss: $0

Trip Win/Loss: $0 and an extra Mintless Doc Johnson Amenity Kit I stole from the guy I dumped the drink on. Don't judge me, the socks are fire! WINNING

Royal Royally!

Day 1 - One gets tired of being treated like a sack of potatoes. Like on the last trip to Vegas.

I think the breaking point for me was when I found myself jammed into economy, arms folded to try to avoid touching the dude next to me.

He'd fallen asleep and his head was tilted at a crazy angle. If his goal was to direct his nostril wind onto my bare skin, he'd succeeded.

There was barely enough legroom.

There was a stopover in the sprawling Atlanta airport.

The door-to-door trip was some 13 hours even though the flying time is 5 hours.

Enough.

With a winning Vegas trip at the end of 2025, and a winning Vegas trip at the end of 2024 (that's two in a row, in case you missed it!) I wanted to go back.

The search began. I wanted a better experience. I wanted - no demanded - a non-stop flight from Florida.

Paydirt.

I used 35,000 Avion points and $400 cash to book JetBlue out of Orlando return to Vegas and back.

And I'm in Mint. YES MINT.

My own little pod, where I can stretch out in a lie flat seat, be treated like royalty, and fart and scratch with impunity.

This is the manner in which I wish to become accustomed.

I booked the best parking at Orlando (except valet). I rented a car in Vegas for the first time in a couple of years.

Yes, I booked it and I'm on my way to Vegas right now, Saturday night, Feb 14th, 2026.

I had some lounge passes from some credit card or other, so I got to the airport and searched for the lounge. I walked all the way to my gate before finding out it was back where I started.

It was about a 10 minute walk.

Oh I had dreams of included drinks, food, maybe a quick shower... 

Wrong. The Plaza Premium lounge was full. 25 minute wait. That wouldn't give me much time to eat and haul ass back to the gate. Now I know.

I said screw that, and walked the long trek back to gate 232. On the way, I checked with JetBlue on what food was going to be available - small plates only. And snacks probably.

My royal self-esteem went in the dumper. I picked up some Punishment Cheese to supplement my Punishment Snacks.

Is this the way this trip is going to go???

Kicked in the Queens

Day 10 Tuesday, and it's the end of this trip.

Maybe 9 nights was a bit long for me. Or maybe it's because I hit those 2 royals and then didn't want to lose my winnings. But I've been on cruise control for the last 2 or 3 days and kind of wishing I was going back to the Greacey Palms Senior Putt Putt Trailer Park early.

That said, I do like flying on New Years Eve as it's one of the quietest travel days of the holidays. Maybe if I do this again next year I'll fly out on Christmas Eve.

Thinking aloud here...

A couple of days ago, I got some symptoms of the Vegas Crud. Fortunately, I've been able to sleep well, and have napped when needed. I haven't felt the need to roar around to all the downtown casinos. And flying solo, I can do exactly what I need to do.

Amazingly, I am no worse for wear this morning as I write this, and I do think I am not going to get really sick, as I'd feared.

When I planned this trip I fully expected to end up sick with something. Travel. Vegas. The time of year. Disrupted schedule. All the things add up!

All of these factors combined to make the last few days pretty low key. It's nice having a couple of royals under my belt. I don't feel the burning need to get one before I leave.

I've never stayed so completely on Eastern time as I have this trip. Usually my nights get later and later and I wake up later and later and have a very difficult time re-adjusting when I get back home. Not this time.

I suppose the fact that there are fewer things that interest me here plays into it as well. The game selection has changed dramatically, and I'm priced out of table games.

In 2019 or so there was almost always a $5 pitch 3:2 blackjack game at the Cal, Main Street, and Fremont. In fact, Fremont had that $3 craps game.

Now minimums are $15, consistently, at blackjack and craps. That's 3 times higher. 200% inflation.

The Cal 'offers' a $10 6:5 game. Well, they can shove that up the ʻōkole.

I used to enjoy a couple or three hours of blackjack every day, usually in the evening. No more.

Many of the VP games I love have been shorted, or removed wholesale.

With the removal of live dealers from the Golden Gate, and the plastering over of any of the historical charm the place used to have, I had no reason to even set foot there.

And the same goes for El Cortez. They've removed most of what was special about the place. All the quirky things have been replaced with the same, boring shit that every casino has. It started when they closed the great coffee shop and they never looked back. Or forward.

Binions has long been a lost cause. It's soul-less and has been for years. (But I hear there's a limited time 50% off sale of hoodies and t-shirts there!!!!)

This trip I didn't bother to play in El Cortez, Golden Nugget, Fremont, Golden Gate, The D (except for Keno tickets). I played $20 worth in the Plaza, which has actually improved over the last 5 years - except it also has been ripping out the old Game King slant-tops and focusing on the 90' tall 10 screen rumbling blasting video slots, just like everyone else.

The changes I have seen from my last trip a year ago are significant, and not good for me.

Maybe general inflation will catch up to the $15 minimums and it won't seem so bad in a few years time.

As we all know, food prices have roughly doubled over 5 years on the strip and downtown. And it's a shame that there's no McDonald's downtown anymore, for that cheap, quick Egg a-Muffin breakfast, or a late night gutbomb QPWC.

Personally, I found my first trip back after the passing of my wife and life-long Vegas partner the Quad Queen absolutely devastating. It was gut-wrenching, but had to be done, I felt.

Last year, it was significantly easier, but I still felt like I was watching myself marching through it by rote.

This year was easier again. I feel like I am slowly finding my place, and able to enjoy my days here in a more carefree way. The trip was not without difficult moments of grief, but for the most part, I can see that I am healing.

So that weight of 'how will it be without my wife' is gone now. I know I can do this and enjoy it if I choose. I still think about her and all the things we did together here constantly, but mostly those are happy thoughts now. So that's progress.

Jesus, enough about me. Let's talk about me instead, and the things I did.

I - awoke. I - made coffee. I - made typey typey on the blog. And I - ate punishment nuts.

And, I - decided on a repeat of the buffet for breakfast.

It wasn't as good this time, it was as if they'd made things fresh on Monday, and served up the leftovers on Tuesday. So many of the cooked things were tough and cold. Check out that sausage patty, and the country fried steak with CTUG:

Manny the Egg Man

The highlight of breakfast was two pieces of banana cream pie, which you can not see below. Note the ironic use of sweetener in the face of the 100g of sugar per slice pie.

Per Les Nessman, this is where one day pie once was.

As I ate, I kept an eye on my 250 game Keno tickets. I'd checked them upon waking and was sad to see that I had no hits on the five spot tickets. And on the six spot, I had two hits of five out of six numbers, except neither of those sets of five numbers matched my five spot tickets. Boy that could have been different.

Still trying to nurse my winning trip to a winning conclusion, I figured that the best play I was getting for my gambling dollar (or hundreds of dollars) was on the Double Double Super Slippery Slappy Slutty Slinky Silly Sloppy Salami Sleazy Times Pay machine.

I devoted $200 to it and played for about an hour and a half. Had some close calls, but no hand pays this time. Harrumph!

Back at the Cal I searched for wins on all kinds of different machines. I'm still in the gambling doldrums, can't seem to find any big wins of any sort.

I took some rest and watched the last of my Keno games. The final reckoning was upon me, and I walked to the D to find out my fate.

I was pretty sure I'd had no big wins, but was pleasantly surprised when the biggest ticket, which cost $125, returned $124.25. In total, $275 worth of tickets returned $200.

Did I take the money and run? No I did not!

I purchased 2 more tickets for $60 each. It's good cheap gambling entertainment. I did a straight up 5 spot and a straight up 6 spot for $0.40 a game each, 150 games. They would finish in time for me to cash the tickets before heading to the airport in the morning.

On the way back to the Cal, I picked up three White Castle sliders. Tasty little beggars.

I ate them and checked in for my flight tomorrow.

And down into the casino, I devoted the last of my $500 stake to trying to win a decent amount on video poker. 

I chose Super Double Double Bonus. I like this game because it has lots of kicker hands that pay well. For example four K, Q or J with a K, Q, J, or A pays $200 at the quarter denomination.

I get those kinds of hands all the time! Should be easy, right?

Well, I was thwarted. Just take a look at the quads I got.

I got Jacks, I got Queens, I got Kings - and none of them with the kicker. To make matters worse, I confirmed after the fact that I made a terrible booboo.

That first quad, I was dealt three Queens with a Jack and a four. And this is something I've always wondered about. Should I hold the Jack kicker on this game in this case?

I looked at WinPoker on my phone, but it doesn't have this game. I even tried to create it but wasn't able to.

In the end, I threw away the Jack, and the fourth Queen appeared where the 4 was. So I could have gotten four Queens with the Jack.

BobbyG said I should have obviously kept the kicker. So, I checked with an expert and John Mehaffy and he confirmed that I should have kept the kicker. Now I know.

So, I ran out of my $500 stake for the day and lounged around the room, watching Keno, and wondering where I am going wrong. Just unlucky since the big royal I guess.

I figured I would shut it down for the trip, but I didn't much like the idea of wasting my time in Vegas. After all, it was a year between trips last time.

And then I got a message from one of my most loyal supporters. Let's call her 'Anonymous Ko-Fi Supporter'.

She said, "Just have fun, what else is money for 😄".

Last night in Vegas. I loosened up, and grabbed $500 more from the safe.

The Quad Queen used to always want to have a lot more cash on her than she actually needed for her stake. And now I think I get it - I felt different. Lighter. Not desperate, as I would have with just $100 to play.

And I got a nice hit on video Keno, and had dinner at the Market Street Cafe. There was a long line-up, so I grabbed a seat at the counter.

I had the Hawaiian Hamburger Steak with fries, and it was delicious. I have a photo of it, but the photo looks gross. There's too much detail with the new iPhone camera! The onions look like they are crawling over the hamburger patty.

It was delicious, you'll just have to trust me on this one.

After dinner I played through the video Keno winnings. I struck up a conversation with an ISG who was hammering high volatility $2 Triple Double Bonus video poker. I kind of watched through the corner of my eye, and she had no idea what the hell she was doing. Like holding 6, 7 suited. Dealt junk with a Jack and a Queen unsuited and she'd hold just one of them. What the hell? It cost her $400 in the five minutes she was there.

My credits eventually ran out and I was happy to call it a day. I'd played enough.

The live tickets at the D hadn't turned up anything yet, but they would run through the night and I'd check them in the morning.

(Update - no hits. I'll get some money back, but the tickets are losers.)

So, the final day tally is a loss of $600. That puts me at plus $200 for the trip, not including the $600 withheld for tax.

UPDATED

Buffet for breakfast. Put $100 in the lucky DSTP machine. Cashed out $113 profit. The Quad was my last hand of video poker this trip. Nice to quit winners.

Two straights flush! And both with the 8 of clubs!

No kicker though.

Went to the D. Cashed in $18 on my $120 worth of tickets. Oh well. Heh.

That puts the final tally at plus $330 for the trip. My host picked up $150 worth of meal charges. And I'm done gambling for this trip.

And the Quad Queen said hello with this sight at Pinchy and Flashy.

I'm sorry the last few days of this report were kind of dull - but imagine being me and having to live it!

Ah, hell, it wasn't that bad.

Overall, this was an excellent trip - one of the best I've had. It made up a lot for the horrible cruise gambling experience. And, I have now had two winning Vegas trips in a row.

Thank you to my loyal readers, thanks for staying with me through thick and thin.

As always, if you were entertained, please consider throwing a ko-fi or PayPal donation my way. I have real costs associated with keeping the website up, like domain names and such, and those donations make the difference.

Until next time... just remember - where there are credits, there are hope.

Flushiepants out.