Monday, November 5, 2018

Bye Bye Downtown Deuces


Just about every trip to Vegas, I took time out to go to the El Cortez and play one (or both) of the last Downtown Deuces in existence.

I was pretty lucky the last three trips, managing to hit the $500 deuces on two of them.

A good thing never lasts forever, and I tried to enjoy the experience of playing the ages old coin-droppers as much as possible, each chance I got.


From the No-Roller trip report:

"As I approach the El Cortez, as always, my excitement starts to grow as I near the old machines. There is going to be a day when I walk through those doors to find no more Downtown Deuces. Hopefully this is not that day."

Here's the story of my second last hit on the legendary machines.


In May, I wrote:

"Last day in Vegas? I have to take another shot at the Downtown Deuces in the El Cortez. Similar to the evening before, I've limited my downside losses by bringing only just a little cash with me - $165, in this case. In retrospect, I don't know why the number is $165, but I'm sure I had a good reason for it at the time.

I've got quite a bit of time to kill until my host is due at the Plaza, later in the afternoon, and video poker seems like a good way to kill it. And it is.

I want to remember everything about the experience. I try to drink in the atmosphere. It's pretty foul so I settle for small, reasonable sips of the atmosphere.

I look, I listen, I take my time, and feel joyous playing this wonderful game in this great, historic casino, in this, yes, fabulous town."


All I can hope for at this point is that maybe just maybe these machines will see the light of day again. Maybe they've just been moved or put in storage.

Maybe.

Wednesday, October 24, 2018

The Blackjack Cheerleader


When I woke up at 5:00am, I knew that I had a very long day ahead. All day in Vegas, get in the rental car at 9:00pm, gas it up, dump it (maybe even at the car rental center), horrible shuttle bus to the terminal, take off for Toronto at 12:15am. Six hours later, on the train to Flusherville Junction.

I've had some really great winning days but I can't recall having two in a row like the last two days, where I pretty much won all day long, with some blips.

Could I do it again on this, the last day of my trip? I have to admit, I didn't think so. The key was to be careful, conservative, cautious, and cash savvy.

None of these are traits that I possess.

After some internetting, featuring hand-crafted hot-brewed direct-to-cup signature in-room coffee, I set out to have 'some of the green' at the Main Street Station breakfast buffet, and embark on my planned activities, which included playing in a slot tournament and enjoying some free play at the Golden Nugget, other gambling, drinking, and possibly a steak.


Check the 'some of the green' box.

Looking back on the day, I ain't gonna lie, it wasn't pretty. And this is evidenced by the dearth of photographic evidence. Which means there wasn't much to photograph.

I stooped to taking pictures of other people's wins.

The gambling day began at the scene of the Aces Kicker Bonanza - nickel Super Slutty Times Pay. It seemed like things were going to be fine!

First quad of the day!

View from the nickel gambling console.


I played out all the credits from the first two quads, which is not unexpected on a game like the one you see pictured there.

It was time to hit the Nugget. On my round of the slot tournament, the woman next to me had pretty much double my points at every point during the session. I knew I had no chance. Fair enough.

I decided to do freeplay on dollar short pay crap poker, and I did just fine! An early full house meant I'd cash out some dough from this exercise.

$50 freeplay becomes $75 cash. Woot.
This is the point in the day, approximately 10:17 AM, when my day became, with a nod to Mr. Lahey,  a shit-covered hot shit sandwich on rye, with a side of shitslaw, and a shitberry shake. In other words, a shiticane of bad luck.


Tuesday, October 23, 2018

Last Minute Heroics

Just a quick update from my phone before I head to the airport.

Today has been pretty rough. The luck taps definitely got turned off for the most part. What can I say, it sucks. 

The purple chip attempt from a $100 buy in was one of the worst blackjack sessions I've ever experienced. I hate to admit defeat but it ain't gonna happen this time. 

I did get one more set of nickel Pointies. No kicker though.


Last chance for monetary romance is on Triple Double Bonus at McCarran. 

I'll give you all today's deets from Flusherville tomorrow.

Oh Yes They Call Him the Streak

The D welcomed me into with its non-stop party, with legs spread further apart than they should be for the shortness of her skirt, an off-center glassy-eyed gaze and slurred speech, which could barely be heard over the poundy-poundy soundtrack. Then it insisted on shaking my hand, and shouting at me "I LOVE YOU, MAN..."

It didn't slow me down - I had $5 free play and I aimed to use all of it in one glorious sitting. But first, the Vue bar and an iced Maker's Mark had my interest.

I haven't played often at this bar, but I should. Where else are you going to find a progressive 8/5 Bonus Poker bartop?

My twenty slipped in and play began. I noticed that the progressive on the straight flush was up there pretty high, and reflected that I hadn't hit one so far this trip, despite many draws from four.


Not more than two sips in, a beautiful sight spread itself across my screen. I muttered a "Holy shit!", but didn't fuck around with a photo or anything. With a progressive winner, you don't want to risk having someone else hit it while you are posing for Instagrampa. No, I held all the cards, did a quick check, checked it again, and hit Draw, locking in not only a dealt straight flush, but a sequential one to boot. What a beautiful thing!


Damn, what a lucky hand! I played a few more and cashed out at some fairly even number, blew the $5 freeplay (got nothing) and bailed.

Out on Fremont I spotted my friend, Mr. Rasta Steeldrumplayerman - and now that I think about it, didn't I start winning yesterday after getting a nod from him?

He was dragging his equipment along Fremont for the day's musicmaking, and I stopped, shook his hand, and said hello.

"I love your smile, and I love your music," I said.

He smiled more.

Now I was bound to be even more lucky!

On I went, enjoying the sunshine and warm temperatures. This week of the year is the best time of year to visit Las Vegas, followed closely by the remaining 51 weeks of the year. But the weather in mid October is just stunningly gorgeous, like myself.


I walked along the sidewalk beside the ElCo, along Fremont, and ducked in the last door. The Keno desk Sheila checked my ticket and awarded me $17.50, a princely sum amounting to some 23.837% of my wager. So that counts as a speedbump in the winning cash expressway.

Fancying another drink, I sat down at Ike's bar and put a $5 bill into the bartop.


Monday Wonday

Boy, having a winning day in Vegas sure improves your mood. I woke up brimming with joy, and cash, ready to take on the casinos.

It always takes a few days to get my Vegas legs on - there is no sense of false confidence here, this time. I know that things can run very badly. I made that mistake the other day with an early win of a couple of hundred, and then a slide into tilt city, with an all you can lose pass.

That said, there is another side to this. Streaks are streaky and they do continue. Flusher's rule. And just like in baseball, you never fuck with a streak.

I did the coffee in the room thing and did some writing for y'all, and then I headed down to the Luxor casino to see what was what, and have breakfast at the Pyramid Cafe.

Will I never learn about Mlife resort credits? My offer came with $100. But it doesn't cover parking fees. It doesn't cover purchases at the little stores. It covers food, and entertainment.

So that's how I found myself with about $70 unused. That's a big stack of hotcakes, I can tell you.



I ordered a veggie omelette with cheese, side of turkey sausage. It was one of those meals that nothing is quite right. The coffee wasn't really hot. The avocado on top of the omelette was iced. And looked like hell. The hash browns were cold. The sausage didn't come until I asked. They were luke warm. Fortunately the eggs were piping hot, but it just wasn't my kind of omelette. It was solid egg all through folded over some veg from a bin. And about 0.204828 oz. of cheese. Toast was dead cold and you had to butter it yourself with ice cold butter. Breakfast: $30.

I didn't complain, I just wanted to be done. Nothing was going to sully my mood today.

The High Limit area beckoned and I sat down to play some quarter short pay Bonus Poker on Spin Poker, one line at a time. The first $20 went fairly well, but did disappear. The second $20 went great! I played for an hour solid rapidly advanced to 3 lines. (I was *not* going to do the stupid tilt 9 lines at a time.) Some nice quads came my way and I cashed out some winnings.






Luxor could not be vacated without a final visit to the Buffalo ATM - and on a whim, I played its neighbor.