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Saturday, July 17, 2010

High Stakes Video Poker

We went down and picked a couple of likely machines. (Have I mentioned how pretty one of the cashiers at the cage at MSS is? She is polynesian by descent and has long straight hair and pouty lips and beautiful eyes.)

(Have I mentioned I am easily distracted?)

We each loaded up a machine with $100. We had enough money for four hands each. The idea was to take turns and hope for a dinger.

My first hand came up four to flush. Another heart and I’d be up $100. But no, it was a queen, and I had a pair, so won back $25.

The QQ drew 8 4 6 J 4 – a pair of fours. An auspicious beginning. The draw card was… a rag.

Nothing. $25 gone.

My second hand was nice – I was dealt 3 J 3 J 9. I had a dinger! Oh for a full house, which would be worth $200. The draw came up with a queen but I was still ahead now.

The QQ matched me with a nice hand – 2 2 4 4 5. A dinger, and also full house potential. No improvement but a $50 hand.

My third hand saw me with 9 A J 7 10. Well that’s just fucking great. I held the suited A J and finished with a pair of Aces.

The QQ’s third hand was a loser.

“Okay, this is my fourth and final hand. Here we go,” I said, ready to push the deal button and risk another $25.

“Double or nothing.”

“What??? You never said! You said four pulls.”

“We’re playing high stakes double or nothing. That’s what we’ve done all along.”

“Oh fuck! But you bailed at $150!!!”

“But I was down to zero so that’s way more than double.”

There was no sense arguing about it. I was getting a real rush from this level of action. I was nervous about playing on, but at the same time, I kind of wanted to. After all, what had we come all that way to Vegas for?

I played again – I got… nothing.

The QQ pulled up a beauty – 9 7 3 Q 8. Hold the Queen and draw… nothing.

Next hand for me – pair of sixes. Draw and… nothing.

At this point Mrs. F was down to $50 and I had $75. I pressed deal again. I felt tingly. I thought I might have wet myself and shorted something out.

3 7 5 6 8. WTF???

“Oh great.”

I held the outside straight draw.

Got a 7. Nothing.

The QQ held a pair of deuces… nothing.

I could see the way this was going to go.

QQ’s last hand – A 9 3 Q 6. Nothing. She was finished.

My last pull – Q 4 6 8 3. I held the Queen and my breath.

Pressed Draw.


We were both busted.

And that, is gambling.

RF has: $190 Day: $+10 Trip: $-670
QQ has: 0 Day: $-200 Trip: $-490

After ten days in Vegas we were down a $1160. Not bad, not bad. One more royal could turn that around. We’d certainly been playing enough. And I’d managed, this day, to eke out a $10 profit. Now that beat any day on the size 7 grommet line back at North American Veeblefetzer!

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