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Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Vegas - The Last Day of the Final Gambling Conflict

Last day in Vegas and I have unfinished business. I like to try to tick all the boxes, and I've got the most important things - the Royal, and a winning trip (unless I fuck up severely today). But haven't hit the Aces with kicker on DDB and no deuces either.

Kept my stake to $140, what I had left from yesterday. I want to take home at least $1000 in winnings this time.

Headed down to the casino and first order of business, extended my room by one more night since I have a red-eye out of town at 11:30pm. It can be quite a long haul when you have to be out of your room in the early afternoon. Anyway, it was only $24 so deal done.

Hit the Bonus Poker and played about 400 hands with no quads. Lost 40. Lost 20 on Jacks. Hit the bar DDB, my usual panic chase go-to game. I was down to about $60 in my wallet when, once again, it coughed up. Quad fours for $104. So I'm looking okay at that point.

Dumped the obligatory $21 into Megabucks (another unticked box on my list, winning Megabucks). Hit the Bonus Poker again and dumped $20 in just 30 hands. The last day of the trip always seems to be like this.

On my last five credits though, I hit quad Queens for $31.

And then I proceeded to dump another $60 into the stupid game.

Scooted over to the Golden Nugget (bastards) and tried 20 in Bonus Poker there. It lasted 20 minutes. Which was no fun, because the 108 year old 60 pound great great grandmother was chain smoking and hacking bits of lung up. Well not really, but it sounded awful. I felt bad for her because that lifetime of smoking is definitely going to be the end of her. She looked rough and sounded worse.

So now, I'm grasping at straws to get more budget for the day without touching my winnings. That means collecting all $6 in cashback from the Nugget. I immediately dump $5 of this at Binions, and play the dollar left over, plus four quarters in change, on a Keno ticket. Two games, a dollar each. I don't win. In fact, In only get one number to match at all.

On to Main Street Station where I try Loose Deuces, with that juicy $750 premium on the deuces, which I have never, ever hit. Oh what great blog reading that would make, I think as I play away. Instead, I hit four Kings (and a deuce) for $15. Very annoying, but I'll take it, and the $2 scratch card too.

I go to check on my cashback, but there is none, I burned all my points on meals and coffees. So much for that.

At this point, I'm down $120 on the day and I'm depressed. I hate the long trip ahead of me, I hate that its over, and I hate that the sweetness and wonder of winning has been replaced with the bitterness and non-wonder of losing. Why can't I just see the bright side, and be happy that I'm up?

Because I gamble, that's why.

I want to win every time, all the time, and if I don't win, I figure something is wrong.

This is why I spend most of my gambling time in a state of disappoinment and frustration, and why I scream like a 3 year old when I hit ANYTHING.

I giggle a little bit too.

Anyway, the solution to running out of gambling budget is, of course, to go shopping. But first, lunch. I had $3.83 comp dollars on my Binions card, so I saddled up at the counter and wolfed down a cheeseburger. I grabbed the WAX with exactly 30 seconds to spare, and rode out to the Premium Outlets and wandered around. The weather was again stunning so it was actually pretty good to be outside.

I found three pairs of shoes to buy. Maybe I could become a shopoholic if this keeps up.

Getting the bus back I scored again, with only a 3 minute wait.

Ladies, guys care about this stuff. We want to minimize waiting times to razor thing margins. We just do. I mean, there's nothing more gratifying than strolling out of Binions, with cheeseburger breath, practically still chewing, and just walk right onto the bus you planned to take and watched the clock for.

Back at the Queen's I lost my last $20 of stake at the bar.

Showing great restraint, I started to pull 20 after 20 from outside my stake and jam them down the throat of the goddamned bartop video poker machine.

That's right.

I broke my own rule and dipped perilously close to the $1000 goal. I just thought I could pull off some miracle that would read really well in the blog, like getting the Aces with kicker or a second royal. And indeed all of a sudden, I was dealt four to a royal in diamonds.

And indeed, all of a sudden, I drew the fifth card which was the seven of hearts.


Blew through $80 and walked away. Went upstairs, showered, took an inordinate amount of time to pack, and decided to have prime rib at the Cal. But first, I stopped off at the slot club and set up my cashback.

I had $37 dollars coming! Sweet! A breath of life.

Got it and walked to the California.

I ate at the counter at the Cal coffee shop and as usual, the prime rib was excellent. It's a great value. Grabbed a bottle of hooch, because I couldn't guarantee that Duty Free would be open when I landed in Chicago at 5:00am (oh God).

Stopped off at my old friend, dollar Treasure Chest. Slipped in a 20 and got a bunch of hands. Cashed out 50. That was 30 profit to add to my cashback stake!

At this point, I had increased my stake to $220 for the day, of which I now had $70.

Back to the Four Queens for one last bash at it.

I hit up the 50 cent Jacks. And $20 went in less than a minute.

Switched to quarters, to be conservative, and put in a second 20. I won nothing. NOTHING on that 20. As in no wins whatsoever. As in every hand a loser. Gone.

Back to the bar.

Another 20. Another 4 to a royal. Gone in a few minutes. I was so pissed I didn't even bother with the last $10. I just went upstairs, grabbed my stuff, and headed for the bus stop.

The WAX came on time and took just under 30 minutes to drop me at Level 0 (which was where I belonged, gambling wise) at the airport. Good deal for $2. Screw you, tunneling cabbies.

Got checked in, flight is full, and United keeps trying to sell extra legroom seats for an additional $50 each. Sorry, I just won't play that game. It's only 3 1/2 hours, I'll suck it up and keep my dough.

Mrs. Flusher and I have had a tremendous streak of luck at McCarran, as readers of this blog will have noted.

I sat down, head cleared after having been out of the gambling business for at least 2 hours and 9 minutes.

Put in my actual, real, last $10 that I was going to gamble on this trip. Selected Triple Double Bonus Poker Plus.

Played 6 hands.

On hand number 7, held two threes.

And laughed.

Final tally, down (only!!!!!!!!!) $70 on the day, up $1095 on the trip.

It was a great one, really really great, I feel super fortunate and lucky. I had more winning this trip than probably ever. And I am also really glad to have been able to share it with readers of the blog.

Until next trip, that's Vegas... the Royal Flusher Way.

    1 comment:

    1. Thank you for playing at Macarran Airport Slots we appreciate your business, please come again and thank you

      Nelia Bortz


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