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Sunday, July 24, 2011

I Never Get To Go Anywhere - and Vegas Updates

I have to admit, I'm kinda feelin' sorry for myself. While the Quad Queen is galavanting in Vegas with the MotherFlusher, I'm stuck back here in Flusherville.

And, I have to kind of keep an eye on that FlusherFIL. So, before my shift at North American Veeblefetzer (where I hold court over the size 7 grommet line - now 37 days accident free - we are still looking for Jimmy's fingertip, can you believe that?) at lunch time, after my shift, and sometimes in the evening, I'm hauling ass across town to the FlusherFILs house to make sure he is stocked up on Molson 0.5% beer, and hasn't left the stove on or anything.

And on the weekends, I'm stayin' over so we can play cards till all hours of the night (9:15pm) and talking about our various medications. He pretty much has me beat on that front.

In fact, the other day he showed me a weird triple decker pill that looked like a miniature Big Mac.

"What's that for?", I asked him.

"That's to keep my prostate from swelling."

"How do you shove that tiny thing up there?"

"I swallow it, dumbass, it works from the top down. Sheesh."

He's pretty annoyed that I am on the scene and checking that he took his Big Mac pills 3 times a day. I guess I can understand that.

The good part is, we don't have to cook much, and we can leave the cleaning until the MotherFlusher comes home. (I think.)

Just the other night, we each ordered a small pizza, and I only had to pay half the bill. Its really an arrangement that is to my benefit.

Just like the big-shots in Vegas, we are playing cards for some heavy action. For example, if I get 15, 2 then 15, 4 and a pair is 6, I get to move a plastic peg 6 points on the crib board. The next hand, I might get to move a dirty toothpick because one of the plastic pegs is long gone. And, if one of us skunks the other, it counts for 2 games and not one. Now that is what I call 'high stakes cribbage'.

My loving Quad Queen wife took 3 minutes out of her busy, busy schedule in which she has to accomplish eating great food, getting drunk, and gambling her ass off till all hours to send me an email with the vital trip information you all and I have been dying to here.

And so the very latest is as follows.

Ass, Gas or Grass - Nobody Rides for Free.
The check-in at the Golden Smugget was a cluster-flusher. The keys to the first room didn't work. Then they didn't have another room with 2 queen beds. They scored the upgrade but the hotel put a $350 hold on the credit card triggering it to be shut off. And they couldn't charge meals to the room because the front desk got it all messed up. I'm not sure what the dealio was but it took an hour to sort it at the desk.

The MotherFlusher's very first day in Vegas started with eggs, hashbrowns and lucky sausages. Mrs. F had a philly cheesestake.

Then they hit the machines near the Grille, playing some quarter Bonus Poker.

And wouldn't you believe it, the MotherFlusher was dealt four to a Royal in her first session??? She didn't get it but what a great start to her VP career.

Mrs. F. hit a quad and on the first day was dealt four to a Royal on six separate occasions. I am hoping this is an indicator of lots of Royals. (What I'd really like for her to do is get her first ever dollar Royal though.)

They hit the bar at the Four Queens for some bartop drunken Double Double Bonus (that's when I got the rather fuzzy phone call yesterday). Picture with the Million at Binions. Touring around, playing, having fun, doing all the things that I should be doing.

At Main St. Station, they hit the Treasure Chest machines - Mrs. F managed to get 500 quarters for one of her quads. Not too shabby!

All the scratch cards were $2 ones and they've replaced a bank of machines we used to like to play just outside the buffet with some weird loud video 'Wheel of Meat' machines. They saw some woman spin for $1000, which was pretty cool.

Mrs. F collected her and the FlusherFather bets on the Bruins for $90 apiece - nice return on a $10 bet.

At the ElCo, they checked in to the Flame and had just a salad, and the mac and cheese. Yummmmmm!!!

Today, Sunday, they were playing here and there and Mrs. Flusher is down $200 while the M.F. is down $400. Welcome to Fabulous Las Vegas, honey!

I think she is due for some good luck - and in fact, between the two of them, they've hit 3 straights flush.

Tonight it is a limo ride down to Bellagio to see 'O'.

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