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Saturday, September 3, 2011

Sleep is important. So is breathing.

Well, I've been reading up on how to do things to my Nook Color and it looked pretty simple to buy a micro SD card, shove Android onto it, and jam it in the Nook so as to have a cheap Android tablet.


And you know what, it was!

I got this thing up and running as a tablet in a couple of hours. Now I can finally play those Angry Damn Birds I've been hearing about for so long.

Best part is, it leaves the Nook software intact - it's like two devices in one!

Chippy's teeth were looking pretty crusty in spite of our best efforts to regularly descale them - this is a romantic after dinner activity any couple could enjoy, btw. But it was time to take her to the Vet and have them really clean the insides, and maybe pull a few that have problems.

We took her down to the Flusherville Veterinary Service. It's easy to find - they are just in behind Dead Buck's Taxidermy shop ('For friends who are friends for ever').

I loaded Chippy up and wheeled through town, down to the edge of town, and crept by Dead Buck's into the Vet's parking lot.

We dropped her for the day and actually the news came back good. They put her out (temporarily) and gave her a good cleaning. Chippy's crowns are all worn down - as in completely gone. But no extractions were necessary. I am thinking about getting my next round of dental work done at the Vet's.

Chippy has two weeks of antibiotics to take - one pill twice a day. Peanut butter, struggling, and vice grips figure prominently in this ritual which I am starting to slightly enjoy. I think its the light dog slobber/peanut butter scent my fingers have afterward and its all I can do not to lick 'em clean.
The other thing she has is toothpaste. Sort of like Doggy Sensodyne. Except this toothpaste is not mint flavored - it is poultry flavored.

Mrs. Flusher is having her snooty euchre ladies over next Wednesday. I usually steer clear of 'em because frankly, they don't approve of me. In fact Lucy Snervens, who is herself about 80 pounds north of 'big boned' keeps poking me in the stomach and making comments about my 'Molson One-pack'. 

Come Wednesday, I'm going to slap some of this chicken goop on crackers and put it on the bridge table (next to the Bridge Mixture), if I can squeeze by Lucy Snerven's 'ass-floweth-over' butt saddlebags.

I know that Lucy loves pate.

Getting the chicken paste onto Chippy's crown-less choppers is another fun experience. It takes four goes at it, upper right, lower left, upper left, upper right. You put some chicken paste on your finger and try to apply it to the teeth while prying Chippy's jaw open with the other hand. Did you know that dogs have a jaw strength equivalent to one of those 6000 pound industrial presses we use and North American Veeblefetzer to pop out the size 7 grommets?

I count my fingers after every adventure with the chicken paste.

The other day, it was time to go and get the results from my hot night at the sleep lab with the sultry Brazilian ex-stewardess and now sleep-lab-bunny Nicky.

Frankly, it was a bit of a shock.

Actually, it was a huge shock.

And I'm not really quite sure how it is that I'm functioning. Or even alive for that matter.





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