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Tuesday, July 30, 2013

How to Stay Free in Las Vegas - Part 3 - Loving The Cal

Stiffened with my success at charming the Mynions at Wynn, I set my sites on the other thing I needed to make this upcoming trip a success... a stand at The Cal.


I love the Cal. It's homey, it's full of Aloha spirit and potential Island Senior Girlfriends, it's got tasty simple food, lots of good video poker, and I just feel good there.

And when I win, they give me a t-shirt, which features, inexplicably, a frog amidst a bunch of cash on the back.

And the cocktail service is the bomb, especially from the server who had blue hair at Hallowe'en, and when I asked her about it the next stay said, "Oh yeah. I guess that was me."

I'd already booked an offer at Main St. Station, so what was I going to do?

Get on the phone and start flim-flamming around, that's what.

I talked to recorded MSS/Cal attendants, MSS operators, Cal reservation agents hidden away in some secret Playboy grotto on The Cal's fabled 13th floor, recordings of the husky Steve Wynn, the front desk at The Cal, and finally...

...the holy of holies...

the Player's Club.

I talked to a host and told her what the issue was. She asked for my player's card and did clackety clack on the Boyd computers.

Well, in a flash, she told me that she could switch my 'home property' to The Cal, and book me in, comped.

"Now, you need to understand...," she said, and I braced myself for bad news.

" are booked in comped for all your room nights....BUT!..."


I closed my eyes, squeezed them tight, tigher than the eye squeeze you used to do when your Mom washed your hair with 'Suave' shampoo.

I was ready for the ultimate disappointment.

"...I can only cover your food for all but the last night."

Did you hear me complain? No way, baby.

They may look like something a bunch of grade 9 high school students put together for a raffle, but the power of the California Hotel and Casino Meal Book is pretty much unstoppable, gastronomically speaking of course.

And one of those sweet, cheesy books would be mine for (almost) the duration of my stay.

The points I'd generate playing video poker will easily cover meals for the last day and then some.

"Aloha.... baby!" I said, trying to sound like Steve Wynn.

I was greeted with the sexy high-heel like sound of a phone hanging up, no doubt once held by a steamy, interested, Island host, whose name sounded pretty sexy. I think it was, like, "Conch" or something.

I am totally set for this trip.

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