Sunday, July 28, 2013

How to Stay Free in Vegas - The 20th Anniversary Cheapstravaganza Trip

People keep asking me why I keep going back to Vegas.

"Why do you keep going to Vegas, Flusher? Why not go somewhere else for a change?" they ask me.

In return I ask them why they keep going back to their cottage every weekend all summer long.

Or I just smile and think 'screw you!'.

Why do I keep going back? Because I have one billion trillion amounts of fun there, because I could win a bundle and get paid to go on vacation, because I love gambling, because of the food, because I'm comfy there (just like those mooks at their stupid cottage), and because its cheap.

Even with a $695 Air Fuck You Canada airfare from Flusherville Regional Aerodrome to Toronto to Vegas, my next trip is going to be incredibly cheap, if you don't count gambling.

Why do I say that? I say that because every stinking night in Vegas this trip is going to be comped up front.

How did I get those offers in my mailbox and email?

Simple. You build a relationship with the casino, get your play tracked, and they send offers if you hit certain levels of play.

Our average long-term loss gambling is around $75 a day, but we get lots of free rooms and lots of free meals.

That beats the hell out of the $90 a night I'm paying to stay on the prairie in Saskatchewan next week, I can tell you.

So let's look at some of the sweet offers that have come my way from the marginal to the primo.

El Cortez - casino rate


Ummm Casino rate? That's a rate you get when you've play in the casino in the past but not enough for them to comp you. El Cortez is still screwing me around - I've played similar amounts in lots of downtown places to get comped, but they still stiff me. Maybe its because I beat them up on dollars last time.

The miniature of Jim Beam is a nice touch though, to keep that downtown rubby-dub feeling alive.
The D - buy one get one. As if.We've played here on and off for years (including the Fitzgerald's years) and we still get theBe 'sort of' offers.

Buy one night get one free, $10 match play, $5 free play. Yawn. I can do better.

The Smug Golden Nugget - SFA

Mrs. Flusher has a two night offer here but I don't. Just a dickscounted room rate. Given that they have implemented an evil $5 Downtown FSE Fake Resort Destination Screw You Fee I won't be giving the Nugget my custom this time around.

They have a lot of fucking nerve to still claim they don't charge a resort fee. Because they do.

Main Street Station - 3 nights free, $40 in food

Now we are talking. That's a proper comp. With the points I'll earn on my card gambling, I'll be able to pay for the rest of the required food at a discount, using those points.

I also have the same offer in September, so it might be worth staying over.

Four Queens - 3 nights free, $30 freeplay, video poker tournament with two breakfasts and some shoddy Chinese made take-home merch

Now we're talking. Freebie room, some food, some gambling, some merch which may or may not be worth keeping, and the chance to win cash, cash, cash in the tournament - up to $4000. Oh hell yeah.

Dicksalibur - 2 nights free and $30 freeplay

Great, but it's Dickscalibur. MILFE offers are based pretty much on my VP play there a couple of trips ago, and my crazy chasing of the Lion's Share $2.3 million dollar slot progressive.

I can also stay at Luxor if I want.

T.I. - discounted room.

Huh? Did I win too much last time? 
MGM Grand - 2 nights free, with suite upgrade based on availability

Never mind any freeplay, this is a much better comp. A 'green handshake' at check-in should assure me of a suite. And if that doesn't work, I'll offer the clerk a tip.
Encore / Wynn- sigh

So we've fallen in love with the ridiculous extravagance, overpriced food, and terrible paytables at EnWynn. It's just so damn nice!!!

The Quad Queen's card and mine are linked - but she gets the great offers and I get bupkis. Example: She has an offer for 3 free nights with suite upgrade if available, and $200 freeplay.

I'm going to get on the blower and see if I can somehow use this offer, since we are linked in various ways.

Did I mention that this is a solo trip?

Yes it is... sadly, I'll have to have all my fun on my own this time.

Stay tuned for more details.

This just in:

For some reason HOOTERS has started sending me tournament offers which seem to include a well-endowed pair of free nights. It's nice to rack up offers like this.

More tips on how to get free room offers:
  • register at casino hotel websites 
  • always use your players card for slots, video poker, table games, keno, whatever 
  • play where you stay 
  • concentrate your play at certain properties - don't spread it willy nilly 
  • keep your daily average as high as possible at a property - play all day one day, instead of an hour a day for five days 
  • learn video poker strategy and play the best return games to get the highest coin-in 
  • play downtown

2 comments:

  1. Good advice as ever Flusher and thanks for the heads up about the GN resort fee - how long has that been in place?? Geez...

    ReplyDelete
  2. That only started recently - I think it comes into effect this month, August. See later posts about MORE downtown 'resort' fees.

    ReplyDelete

Leave a message for Royal Flusher!