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Friday, May 2, 2014

To the GrommetMobile!

Day 9

This is one of those days where there aren’t a lot of pictures, and there aren’t a lot of notes. And there isn’t a voice recording of what happened.

And why would that be?

Las Vegas can be a cruel mistress. One day she can be your best friend and lover, saying here’s all my money, now tell me what you want me to do to you.

And other days she is a hot bitch in cheap vinyl thigh-high boots that make her legs all sweaty and stinky and says through ruby red painted lips, “I’d apologize for kicking you in the balls repeatedly and taking all your money, except I’m not sorry at all. So long, sucker!”

Guess which Vegas we got today? Yup, Ms. Naugahyde.

For those days when you get two Royals in a day, or hit some ridiculous dealt hand, there are other days like this one.

There were a few wins here and there, but only enough to tease you into thinking it might turn around, and then you play it all back, chasing.

Okay, now how about the facts of the case?

I was on duty for Royal Canadian Veeblefetzer again today, helping GrommetCon 2014 attendees get onto and off of our GrommetMobile. By the end of the day, I couldn’t lift my right arm from helping people up and down out of that rolling cheesy deathtrap

That didn’t stop me from losing $300 before breakfast. It was the same for the Quadless Queen too, both of us down 3 bills. Here are my exact notes, texted to myself on the piPhone 3.14.

Both down 300 before breakfast.  

Quarter vp. Dollar slot. Dollar high vol vp

QQ down 300. No quads either of us. My last was 9999 on deuces

Everything is wrong. Waitress leaves while I'm telling her how I want my coffee.  It's wrong. DishwAter. Breakfast order wrong. Hash browns burned. Same shit coffee. 

Why do I tell you all this stuff? Because its what happened. My commitment to you, my readers, is to relate the truth of what happens to me in Vegas. (I reserve the right to do it in a stupid, overly verbose fashion, with lots of questionable humor.) And when I can’t properly relate the truth, I make it up so it does relate. That’s the kind of Rob Ford-like integrity you get from Royal Flusher.
The best part of my day was easily Le Thai for lunch. I took a walk and did a series of $20 hit and runs - Golden Gate, Golden Nugget, Four Queens, Binions, Fremont, The D, El Cortez, and then lunch. The only problem was that there was no hits, just the runs.

At least for my meal I found an idyllic spot back in the covered patio, with warm breezes and cool electronica music to soothe me. The meal was wonderful and I had a couple of chicken meatsicles left over to take back to the room for a later snack. They even threw in some extra peanut sauce.

Red curry lunch special
Did I say this was the best part of my day? Something happened this morning that will astound and amaze you.

I may have written about this before - there is a bank of 10 slant tops in front of the cage at the California where we often play. In the morning, particularly the early morning, Judy (aka Nurse Blue) cheerfully brings us our coffee and our Jameson’s, catches up on how Chippy, our 18 pound Dane-huahua, is doing.

The casino is pretty quiet at that hour and there are not many others around. And that’s the problem.

These machines are set up to play what they call ‘attract music’. It’s a horrible little fakey piano ragtime ditty and it plays every four to eight minutes, depending on the machine.

That is, every four minutes on each machine that has the attract music turned on. At one time this number was about 6 or 7 of the machines. You can imagine how tedious it becomes to hear this inane tune over and over and over again.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked about how we could get this annoyance diminished (four times). I just never found the person who could take care of it.

Well this time, I struck gold. The floor guy actually listened to my plight, and cared. And he took care of it right then and there!!!! I got at least 3 of the machines silenced and I think there may be only one left that plays the horrible ‘get Scott Joplin out of his grave’ tune.

Great service, thank you California floor guy!!!!

This was my biggest accomplishment of the day, other than getting a few I.S.Gs room numbers where there were rumored to be GrommetCon 2014 hospitality suites later on that week.
Queens, from one.
Once work at GrommetCon 2014 was done for the day, we played some machines here and there at the Cal, and then spent the evening on the triple play at Main Street Station, where we found at least a little luck. A dealt quad on triple play was the highlight.

There is beauty to be found in Vegas.
Dealt quad on triple play. Lots of scratch cards!


Decent multiplier hand. So often you get naught a sausage.
Vanilla sevens quad.
Aces on the redeal. A little rare.
In the end, the damage was done and done bigtime.

Quad Queen -$700 day -$1570 trip
Royal Flusher -$900 day +$1320 trip

Not only did we lose, but for the first time since my first day, our overall trip results went negative. So much for two Royals in a day.

Did this get me down?

Of course not!

I know better. Why, once I was done my tantrum and cried in the shower for about 90 minutes, I came to realize what I instinctively know about Mistress Vegas - it can and will turn around if you just keep playing - no matter how badly her vinyl thigh high boots stink.

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