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Sunday, January 18, 2015

Ups and Downs and Ups and Downs

Thursday January 15, 2015

I woke up and thought, "This is a great morning for a $200 cup of coffee." And with that, I headed down where Favorite Server Judy brought me my morning styrofoam cup (number one).

While sipping, I played $100 in Bonus Porker. And lost. And moved.

And then I played $100 in Double Double Bonus. And got morning coffee (number two). And lost.

Then I played some more. And you know, I played two hours and only ever had one four-of-a-kind. This was getting to be the thorn in the trip's side. I was sometimes finding it impossible to hit any quads.

Meanwhile, my poor old savvy gambler's aching body was falling apart. The foot still hurt, although it was improving, and my eye was sore, red, and angry-looking. I put either some Polysporin or toothpaste in it - with my cyclops, teared over eye, it was hard to tell.

Either of them would have hurt like a sumbitch, so I'm pretty sure I must have hit the jackpot.

One reader of this blog reflected that I blanched at the idea of spending $70 on scientific insoles that might make my foot agony less, but 6 minutes later walked into Hole Foods and dropped $70 on one bottle of grape juice red wine.

I would like to point out that the red wine will provide significant medical comfort when taken internally.

In the morning goings-on, the Quad Queen did hit a nice set of Aces. Aces are great, especially when four of them appear at once.

One way or another, I was down $400 by breakfast. After breakfast we had a quick look at Treasure Chest. I lost another hundred but the Quad Queen got a quad and chose a $250 chest, a pretty rare occurrence.

While the Quad Queen was getting on a $6000 coin-in run in the alcove, I had to get running on with work. Today there was a lot of stuff to take care of as GrommetCon 2015 was winding to a close. Plus I had to take back the rental Flying V for noon.

I was shoving numbers around a spreadsheet on Jimmy Poon's loaner computer when I got a text from the Quad Queen. (She's sweet, she texts me pictures of the quads she hits while I'm stuck working. It's really nice to have a glimpse into the incredible fun someone else is having while you are stuck slaving for The Man.)

Anyway, the text read, "Can you spell me on hot machine?"

I went out the door, took the elevator down to the casino, and walked past the pit to the alcove. The Quad Queen was in need of bio-relief. I played for her and even won $60 or $70, taking her machine up over $350. She was indeed on a hot session.

She returned and I walked past the pit to the elevator, took it up to the 21st floor, unlocked the suite, and went in.

That's when I realized... the Flying V had to be back for 11:00am, not noon. We'd picked it up early and thus had an early return time. I had just enough time to gas up and get the car back to the Four Queens Avis desk.

That's when I realized the QQ had the key to the safe.

So, I locked up the suite, down the hall and around the corner, took the elevator down from the 21st floor to the casino, turned left, walked all the way along the pit, to the alcove, and got the key from the QQ.

"Gotta take the car back, gimme the key to the safe," I said, fairly intelligently.

I turned around, walked the length of the pit, elevated myself back to the 21st floor suite and went in. Opened the safe and... rummaged

No key.

I felt stupid. Must be in my pocket. Started searching... but no key. How was I going to pick the car up from valet without... the key.... shit.

Of course. The key was with the valet. So I closed the safe and locked it, closed up the suite, took the elevator down to the mezzanine level, took the escalator to the casino level so it would be at least a little different from the last 8 trips, walked the length of the pit to the alcove, confessed my stupidity to the QQ, and headed for the valet. I walked out the door by the big so-called lucky buddha, and retrieved the Flying V.

Consolation prize - the gas guage still read 'F' (for Flyable). So I could get away without buying gas. Biggest win of the day so far. I returned the car without incident.

On my way back through the casino, a dollar Boner Deluxe machine called my name. It ate $100 in 2 minutes. This was really getting old.

Most of the rest of my day was spent tapping keys on Jimmy Poon's loaner laptop while QQ had a winning session at Main Street. She'd finally crapped out on the alcove machine, and was over playing multiplay.

The waitress she'd perverted (the one known as Hot Towels) was very happy to see her, but this sad story was related to me by QQ herself.

Hot Towels spied her and came over and greeted her.

"Should we do it? Jameson and diet? Do it do it???" Hot Towels asked, in the lingo the Quad Queen had taught this poor innocent.

"Just diet Coke," said the Quad Queen.

Hot Towels looked crestfallen.

"No do it?..."

What a shame to let her down like that. She paid the price by eventually losing on the session.

When my day was done, I took a break and we went to the Fremont to play some Spinners.

Three minutes after we sat down, I heard someone behind me say, "Hi, welcome to the Fremont, thanks for stopping by."

I thought it was the chatty cocktail waitress who has a friendly way of addressing people, so I didn't turn around.

But she kept talking, and it turned out to be one of the casino hosts. Somehow she got notified I guess that there were a couple of savvy sucker gamblers in the joint, and she came over to pay her respects to The Flusher.

Long story short, I lost another $200. I had only played a couple of hours total and was down $800 on the day.
I went upstairs to the suite and took a long shower, the cranked open the $70 bottle of wine (for my foot) and spent quite a while getting some blogs out. Meanwhile, Flashy was paying out well, and the Quad Queen pulled to within $160 of even.

Dinner was at Redwood of course, and this time my entree was the lamb chops. And they were amazing. Every bit as flavorful as the rib eye steak, tender and juicy, and mild, not gamey like lamb can be after some knitted cap sheep herder has chased his low-end fly-blown herd up and down a bunch of rock strewn outcroppings. Or maybe I am thinking of goats?

In any case, this lamb was nothing like that lamb.

After dinner, we played some at Main Street Station. My first $100 did okay, but then I burned through $300 in 15 minutes. What was going on with me?

I couldn't take it and I went to bed early. There was no point playing anymore.

That's why I did a desperation $100 in Boner Deluxe at the Cal before heading upstairs. Of course, I got nowhere fast.

Meanwhile, my better half played for a couple of hours on $100. She did $20K coin in, and got $60 in scratch cards, so it cost her $40 for the couple of hours of play.

Something is clearly wrong with me. One observation I had was that I lose the most on the days I play the least. Because dumper.

Royal Flusher: Day -$1300 Trip $-4500
Quad Queen: Day -$200 Trip $-1700


    1. Only a 4% shot at hitting the 250 coin treasure chest. That's some savvy play right there.

    2. I know you are receiving many posts with tips for your plantar fasciitis, but in my case, it took two months of rest to cure it. Nothing else really helps long term. Insoles, etc, just help manage the existing pain. You just have to try to not walk a lot for a month or so, which is probably the opposite of a LV trip.

    3. "One observation I had was that I lose the most on the days I play the least."

      That's because you are refusing your inner Degenerate Gambler. Bad idea, see?

    4. Anonymous (if that is your real name) I definitely exace - excaser - excaszer - made it worse with the incredible amount of airport schlepping I had to do. As of today, it is hugely improved. Thanks for the advice.


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