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Saturday, June 13, 2015

Welcome to Arrr Pirate Drugstore

Day 7 - Sunday - part 3

I walked out of the Dinq the way I'd come in and headed on up the strip. Harrah's was between me and Casino Royale, so I walked through the place and eyeballed it some. On walkabout I generally play at every place I go into, so I threw them a $20 bill. Didn't get anything though.

Casino Royale is a very special place stuck smack in the middle of Las Vegas Boulevard. It's teeny tiny, and always has some weird promotions going on, and its a great place to get cheap drinks and be rowdy. We used to play here every trip when they had a coupon book that paid an extra $20 or $25 for a four of a kind. It was a blast chasing that, trying to get a quad on less than $20. They had lots of full pay machines then too. Then there was the 'free play' promo that left you spinning mindlessly on some special machines that only gave you money if you hit the top jackpot. Which no-one ever did, probably. The best part of this was that you would get great cocktail service while doing the promo - they wanted to get you lubed up so that when you were done you'd be addled enough to stick around and gamble real money.

The current promo looked like easy picken's - play $20 and if you lose it, you get it back. I read all the fine print, the fat print, the medium print, the French and Spanish print, every fucking kind of print they had going, and as far as I could tell, the catch was this - play $20 and if you lose it... you get it back. See what they did there?

Now, I have been known to wager a bill or two on this video. poker. from time to time, so I might have played anyway. Guess which game I chose?

Boner Deluxe.

So, I played my $20 through and didn't get anything out of it. And when it was done... I got given $20 in freeplay. How simple and cool is that??!

Don't let the glass fool you, this was a full on Boner Deluxe play. Which limped out.
So, yeah, blew through the freeplay getting nothing. Out the door I went, heading north in the hot sunshine (well what else would sunshine be in Vegas?).

I stopped here and there to take you some pictures and admire the many ways in which various suits have completely fucked up their once-regal properties. Like sticking a mall in where a pirate bay used to be at T.I. (which used to have a real name, not just a couple of letters.) Or sticking huge building wraps over what were artistically balanced, elegant creations of the finest three-wing hotel architects around.

Heat makes Flushiepants cranky.

What's cheesier than a building wrap? A torn Beatles building wrap.
You won't BELIEVE what happens to this Gondolier's head NEXT!!!!

Pirate Drugstore. Sigh.

Before long, I found myself at Wynn. The way they design these places, you can hardly take a bad photograph in them. I took these just by randomly spinning around, chanting, and clicking the shutter on my Cameron camera every now and again.

I tried for 10 minutes to get a picture of this empty. It was impossible.

And then it was time to get down to some more serious video poker.


    1. What's the deal with Casino Royale? Does the free play automatically load to your card or do you have to go to the booth? That is a pretty sweet deal.

    2. Loving this report as I do all of yours, Flusher. Fingers crossed for a comeback!

    3. jennifer - yeah, it just went on my card. I was pretty shocked! I didn't even leave my seat. Just did the usual button dance on the keypad, entered my lucky PIN, and downloaded $20.

    4. So you get free play AND you do not have to talk to anyone? Let me start my next itinerary document right now so I do not forget...

    5. "You won't BELIEVE what happens to this Gondolier's head NEXT!!!!" is perfect

    6. Casino Royale was our last stop on the strip before we moved downtown. That was before they spent all the money on the expansion. The funbook added significant EV to the 8/5 bonus they had at the bar, and there were two two hour slots during the day where they gave you 3x points, which also helped EV. You could also get tickets for quad bonus from the Voltare machine out front. After they expansion the 8-5 BP went away, the funbook got gutted (and eventually went away also), as did the slot freeplay promo. I did win $100 on it once BTW.


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