Free Gifts at Starship Binions

Friday October 23, 2015 - part 3

We walked down Fremont, talking about our elaborate Hallowe’en costomes. One thing I needed was a lanyard to put my ID card on. We deked into one of those little stores that sells 99 cent shot glasses, t-shirts, and probably peyote in the back, and found just the thing - an I heart Vegas lanyard. Four about $4. It would do!

Next, we played a little at Starship Binions. We didn’t do much, but the Quad Queen managed to get enough points for two promo spins - I had one. She lucked out and got $5 and $25 free play. I got a free gift.

What did the free gift turn out to be? An amazing Vegas themed lanyard, which was even better than the one I’d paid $4 for not eleven minutes previous. This was just another demonstration of how (but not why) my life sucks.

We headed to MSS next and had lunch. I had a little pizza - extra sauce, sausage, green peckers, mushrooms - and the Philly Queen had the chicken philly, specially made with red peckers instead of green peckers. My pizza was really good, and I devoured it, skipping about 80% of the crust, and focusing instead on the cheese and prizes.

I left a business card in the little stand for someone to find (and discard, most likely) and thus fortified, we went off to make our fortune on the Slutty Times Pay machines.

While playing, my friend Brensan and hubby, and a couple of their friends, stopped by to say hello. These were the folks that treated me like family on my solo trip earlier this year. Unfortunately, Branson, whose name I can never get straight, wasn’t in town.

We’d invited them for dinner (we had reservations at the Redwood Grille) but unfortunately, they had other plans. Next time Brensan!!

Brensan was looking for a bar to play at and I sent her to exactly the right place - Boar’s Head of course.

Meanwhile we continued our Slutty Times Pay mission and for some reason, by the time it was done, the QQ and I were both down about $500 on the day. What the hell? Maybe that’s not quite right. I was down $500 and the QQ was down $540. Better?

I got a text from Brensan that she’d had a big win at the bar, 5x Aces kicker for $2500. I went over to see what a winner looks like. It was a beautiful thing, let me tell you.

Given the general losing trend of the day - we’d really taken a shellacing on the Slutty T.P. - we did what savvy losers do - buy a mickey of Schmirnoff on points, and get some 80 cent keno tickets, and head to the room.

We rode the elevator up with about 3 very hot I.S.G.s, the Island Senior Girlfriends that I collect like Bond Girls. They are generally charming and sweet and quite hot, for women born late in the 1800s.

I held the tell-tale sealed paper bag up like a rubby that’s just hit his personal jackpot and held it up.

“The bar’s open in my room, ladies, c’mon up!” I said, suavely.

“Oh, it’s that bad, is it?” said the cutest I.S.G. The three of them giggled at my expense. It takes more than a mickey of vodka and some 80 cent keno tickets to ‘pick up’ a quality I.S.G.

We took a break, and had a few cocktails. I’ve kind of gotten hooked on Bloody Caesars lately after my niece Lamondo and her husband Clevedge got me indoctrinated into their spicy ways recently.  Now, Main Street doesn’t make Caesars, but the Cal does, oddly. Anyway, I’d smartly ordered a spicy Mary from the CW just before departing. MSS puts all of about ⅝ of an ounce in their floor drinks, but I had the cure for that shortcoming, believe you me. You. Me you me. Believe you me you me. That’s right, isn’t it??

Keno didn’t pan out, and the QQ went down for more punishment and variance-based torment, while I blogged. I plugged the charger for my little USAS Bonebook Chromebook in the wall near the window, beside the big unit that houses the fridge.

“Boy,” I thought, “it would be really easy not to see that charger whilst packing up and leave it behind. I’d better be careful to make sure that doesn’t happen.”

When the Quadless Queen arrived back in the room, she looked fornlorn, as if one more tiny piece of negativity would completely put her over the edge, and topple her tenuous grip on sanity.

“I’m down $1000 on the day,” she said.

“You incredible fucking moron,” I said. “Dipstick! What a total loserpoopoohead! Stupid! STUPID STUPID STUPID!!!” I said.

Yes, I said all these things in my head and then spoke out loud.

“Oh well.”

I wasn’t doing much better, being $500 in the hole. So what to do but head back down, prepare for dinner at Redwood Grille, and play some 50 cent heavy Double Double and dollar Boner Pokus video poker action deluxe extraordinaire oo la la ay carumba de ville gambling times pay.

It is more fun to say than it is to live. Before long I found I was down $770 on the day and the Quad Queen hadn’t made any progress either.