As my Dad used to say after a few Carling Red Caps:
She offered her honor
He honored her offer
And all night long
It was honor and offer
I was eight years old. I didn't get it, but I did get an earful when I repeated it to a teacher.
I'm in the throes of planning... the next trip. And it's going to be a full-on Quad Queen enabled dilly. But even after 59 trips to Vegas, I still have a few things to learn about comps. And I'm learning them the hard way.
We're kind of having fun here at Flushiepants Manor, planning this one - by the time we get there in October, the Quad Queen will not have been in Vegas for pretty much an entire year.
We're watching the offers roll in, watching the wheels go round and round - I really love to watch them roll.
There's a bunch of days to fill up in Vegas with whatever the heck we want to do - gosh. So let's take a look in the Flusher Mailbag.
As you recall from the carefully read and thoroughly absorbed Las Vegas $1000 Scrounge Trip, I burned a few bridges.
The offers that casinos mail you, and email you, we call those marketing offers. And they are pretty much geared to a simple formula. The more you play, the more you get. They'll look at the last 2 or 3 visits. They'll look at averages. They'll look at how much you lost.
I took advantage of some pretty sweet offers on my cheap bastard trip and basically stiffed the casinos. So it might be interesting to see how that bad boy behavior has affected the comp love that the slutty casinos are showing me.
I really liked the Trop. I had an offer for 3 nights, $125 in promo chips, and $30 food. And some tickets to Grandpa Rocks the House - From His Rocker. (Okay, it was a pretty good show, and I enjoyed it.)
|Lurve that Tropicana pewl!!!|
But I really stiffed 'em on the play compared to the previous visit - hanging and hovering around the nickel machines like one of 14 male sci-fi club geeks hovering around the only girl in the library.
We called 'em up to check on the offer sitch - the same offer cited above is good 'till Sept 4 - but after that we are cut off.
We've got a very strong history here, but since they gutted the paytables like a mercury infused northern pike, we've totally maligned and abused them. I'm talking cheesegrater on the casino funparts abused.
I underplayed. I played the Quad Queen's free play and no more. I dropped in on off days and played both our free play and no more.
Well, they must look quite a ways back because the offers keep coming and the only thing that's dropped is the free play. We were getting $75 sometimes, now it's mostly $50. Three or four comped nights. Show tickets.
The fun continues at the Nugget!
And funnily enough, I think I am a lifetime winner there. I've had three dollar Royals there ($4000 each) and I think five quarter royals ($1000 each).
Shame there's nought to play there now. I still like the place, so we'll see.
MLife MGM Luxor thingy
I don't even know what MILF is called anymore. Last trip I had 3 nights, $100 freeplay, $100 resort comp at Luxor.
I played maybe a quarter of historical play there. I dry humped that desert sphinxter like a sideways walkin' stiff-legged Party Pharoah with a hole in his loin cloth.
The upshot is... the current offer is higher!!! Now that's some savvy comp generatin'.
They are throwing three nights in a pyramid suite (no thanks, I'll take the tower deluxe room), $125 freeplay, $100 in resort credit.
I booked that fucker faster than an on-the-take beat cop taking down a drunken slum tenant.
And next thing that happens is I get the same offer for Mandalay Bay!!! But the MILF online system is so messed up, it shows no comp nights available between now and the 2017 total eclipse of the sun. (Make America Dark Again!)
I don't want to talk about it.
First of all, the marketing offers we get from Boyd are always crap in comparison to the coin in we do, and what we are offered from other properties.
But that's okay, we are in a groove there. We give them their $10K a day coin in each, and they cough up limo, parlor suite, and gold cards which give us any food or drink we want. And we get to skip lines.
I go to book as usual from our host and she tells me... she can give us food books for 4 of 6 nights. No limo. No gold card.
Because we haven't stayed there in 2015, which is a bit of a kick in the macadamias, because I specifically avoided the Cal, knowing I wouldn't be putting $10K a day through the machines.
When it comes to comps, it's not just how much you play, how much you lost - it's also what have you done for me lately. In my mind we are solid, loyal customers that haven't been able to get to the Cal this year.
In their mind, they are like no three times a year fix for my cash-hungry casino, no comps for YOU.
This fight is not over, not by a long shot. Stay tuned for updates.
I'm still baffled. I did a stay at the ElCo this year and played enough to get my room and food comped off.
Meanwhile, I keep dropping in and playing the Quad Queen's free play and that's all on her card.
I get crap casino rate offers and she gets the 3 night, $25 freeplay, $25 food, 5x points on one day treatment.
I just wonder if maybe its one offer per household. Because it doesn't make sense to me, other than I've kicked their asses on a few occasions.
Hell, she doesn't even want to stay there, and I can't wait to stay there. Go figure. Because I can't.
The D, Plaza
I continue to get lowball dangly loser offers. Discounted rooms. $5 freeplay. $10 match play. That kind of stuff. I did a medium amount of play at Plaza this year but they've offered nothing. Fine by me.
Four Queens and Binions
Once we had a love affair at the Four Queens. And then I got caught ankle deep in one-hundred-greasy-guest shower water. And then again. And then again.
So we ramped down, playing the freeplay and not much else. A far cry from the $12K a day we used to do bangin' those pleasure machines.
But it's over, there's no mailer coming anymore, The things we loved about the Queens were crushed and dyin' in the dirt. We tried to pick up the pieces, over at Binions.
Primarily because Binions has full pay Bonus Poker parlayable slant tops instead of those shoulder-burning rheumo-uprights at the Four Queens.
Lo and behold I am getting $20 freeplay mailers from Binions. I think we will increase our play there. I like the Swiffer Liffer and Fluffer Swipe 'n Grope Spin and Shoot promotion they have there too.
We'll still play at Four Queens. Not interested in the rooms, so don't know if we will chase the freeplay offers again or not.
I think it all comes down to sour grapes for me there, not having gotten a dollar Royal - ever - when playing $12K a day all those times.
CET spells Bank-Rupt-Cy!
I give them play in dribs and drabs and they shower me with free rooms plus resort fee that I never can get around to booking.
One of these times I'm going to do a super cheap trip staying in CET rooms - maybe Bally's or Harrah's - and playing at Ellis Island all day where the full-pay video poker is.
Well. I put my play in last time and the time before and the time before that - and the offer stays solid. Three nights, $200 free play. Also tournament offers.
That one got booked ahead of everything.
Played a couple hours of blackjack there last trip, haven't played there much in years, got sweet Flusher all from them.
This promo would cost them nothing.
Downtown GrandLove staying here, love playing here, they've cut my offers off except for typical persona-non-compa "Stay 89 nights get 1 night half price!" type offers. I just noticed that they didn't get sold again after the rumors late last year. Maybe they are figuring it out. They should have a Cannonball promotion. Paint a volleyball black and fire it through the casino. If it hits anyone, the person gets a prize.
This promo would cost them nothing.
I love this place, they hate my play, they hate me, they look down on me, I want to please them, I need their approval, I love the chugga chugga music and the cocktail waitresses, they send insulting offers.
I can't wait to pay to stay here again. We'll see.
See Also: How to Stay Free in Vegas