RSS findIndex trimsentences createcard



createItems and other JavaScript code

Item Render Code

Saturday, September 16, 2017

Battle of the Downtown Deuces Titans - Part 2

After filling my triangular stomach with a perfectly fitting slice, I got my hypotenass back to the Deuces machine.

It's very popular and there are often people sitting on it for hours at a time (the machine, not my stomach). I fully expected to have to fight a rubby for it, but I've risked a good verbal assault before for this machine and I'll do it again.

El Cortez video poker machine Deuces Wild

I put in what would be my fourth $20 bill and got busy. It didn't go so well.

But it's still fun playing the beat up old upright. The original curvy CRT has long been replaced with a dodgy out of focus flat screen. The flat screen moves significantly if you jab it trying to do touch screen moves (which I did) but it doesn't support touch screen.

In fact the screen is hanging loose, and when people walk around or trucks go by, it jiggles while you are trying to play.

The machine is set to the slowest possible speed, meaning you can read a headline or two on Googly Newsly in between the dealing of each card.

And, the machine is a coin dropper, so if you wants your money, you gots to pay the price.

It didn't take long before I was almost out of credits and considering whether a fifth $20 bill was warranted. In fact, I lazarused. Those of you that think gambling and reading about gambling is sinful will understand what that means. The rest of you probably already know from reading this blog for years.

I coined (heh heh) the term lazarusing for the event where you play your last 5 credits on the machine... but are resurrected by winning 5, or more, credits. You can lazarus a number of times in a row. Hell, you can lazarus enough times to be a cat with nine lives.

Anyway... I lazarused, but then started to hit a few things.

I skipped taking pictures of a couple of fives of a kind, but here's one I did take. It's just as thrilling as the other 9392 photos of video poker hands on this site.

El Cortez video poker machine Deuces Wild

El Cortez video poker machine Deuces Wild

El Cortez video poker machine Deuces Wild

Holy Mackinaw, tiger cats, I'd won back my $80 the hard way! And I had the blackened fingers to prove it. How I've missed that coin-dropper filthy fingers feeling!

Total playing time was about two and a half hours and my fingers hurt. My back hurt. And my hypotenass had taken a good rogering by the naugahyde decorated plywood seating.

I'd had three deuces dealt twice and four-to-a-royal dealt once. Didn't complete 'em. But I cashed out even and headed to the Downtown Grand, just down the street, to see what the Aces kicker were up to at the Furnace Bar.
El Cortez Las Vegas yellow exit door

Shout out to T.H. for the support- thanks! Jimmy Poon might get that new mouse pad after all. :)


    1. You sneaky devil! You ARE there. I thought it was just a mistake, yesterday, when I checked your Home Page & the entry didn't have "Royal Flushers Daily Vegas Pic" as part of the title. Hoping to hear that you've, once again, pulled Aces at the Grand - but with a kicker this time.

    2. I counted all the video poker hand pictures on this site, and I think your wrong on the total. Just thought I'd let you know.

      1. You're right, there is a discrepancy of 3 and a half. It might be attributable to a solar mass ejection.

    3. Unsure the link will work, but we hit the deuces a few weeks ago. We were playing the machine on the end near the coin redemption machine, but it looks like the screen is slightly off on both of them. Nice thing about hitting deuces is that it is a handpay. Notice that the machine says "Jackpot 1000", but it's actually 2000. It was fun. We even hit deuces on the Barbaric Deuces later that night (after hitting a 50c royal at the Lobby Bar). It was a good day at the El Cortez. . .

      1. A friend of mine just hit deuces on that machine twice during the same session! In addition to hitting two royals and a $400+ SF on the Vue Bar BP progressive. I'd say she's having a great trip!


    Leave a message for Royal Flusher!