Flusher No-Rolls It - Saturday 24-Feb-2018

Hello Team Flushiepants! It's the yearly conference grind - GrommetCon, then Grommet Expo, then the Grommet One conference. That'll take a lot of time - but I'm here (barely).

And that's fortunate, because I have minimal bankroll. Forget low rolling, I'm no rolling.

My Bankroll. Earmarked for the Aces no Faces coin-dropper at Main Street Station.

The plan is to have a post each day with some bare and interesting updates - just the way I like 'em. I'll add on to the same post throughout the day, with the new stuff at the top. Should save a lot of fucking around.

When I get home, I'll do the full write-up.

Here's the first round of dispatches - like an Island Senior Girlfriend orgy, the oldest stuff is at the bottom.

Sun Feb 24 2:05am
Somehow scored a big-ass suite. Time for a lucky Heineken!


Sun Feb 25 1:30am

Waiting to check in.

Sat Feb 25 12:55am

My fucking luggage finally appeared. I see what looks like Ms. Tumi lipstick on its zipper. Luggage, I know what you've been up to!

Sat Feb 24 12:00am

The Lunchbox has Landed! Honey, I'm home!

Sat Feb 24 6:45pm

We got boarded. Had to gate check my carry on. Doors closed by 6:00 and we've been waiting in the weeds at the side of the runway ever since. Something about 'weight and balance' or some other fake aeronautical engineering bullshit. Fuck the balance, push the throttles to the firewall, Captain Jimmy, and get us to Vegas!

Sat Feb 24 5:40pm

Tried to change my seat - uh uh, plane is completely full. A very loud drunk man is making a fuss.

He's Irish. This could be bad.

Sat Feb 24, 2018 4:40pm

Landed at PHL. Hauled ass the full length of the terminal to the customer service desk, then the full length of the terminal back. Sound familiar?

I don't travel well, do I.

But I got a seat on the 6:05. Not the sweet 7A I had, the accursed 13B.

Sat Feb 24, 2018 3:15pm

Holy shit, just made it. The ne'er-do-well taxi driver pile-drove at 75 the whole way on Interstate 81. That earned him a ten-spot. Hauled ass the full length of the terminal to security, got through, and hauled as the full length of the terminal back to the gate. Plane was half boarded when I got there.

But I'm aboard! I'll make PHL in time for the 6:05 flight - so why didn't she leave me on that, and then I could have rebooked if I didn't make it?

Sat Feb 24, 2018 1:55pm

The Watertown American Airlines agents are moving out as many people as they can. It is likely my flight won't go at all. It's the only daily flight to PHL. International my ass!

I'm in a taxi to Syracuse's Handcock airport. There's a flight leaving at 3:22 to PHL. For some reason, I'm rebooked on the 9:00pm to Vegas out of Philly.

It takes an hour to get to the airport. Going to be tight. 

Sat Feb 24, 2018 12:55pm

Back to the airport. Flight is further delayed until 4:00pm. Apparently the airplane they need couldn't make it from PHL to here, so that flight was cancelled. Thus, no airplane.

Sat Feb 24, 2018 12:02pm

Flight to PHL delayed until 3:05. Should be no problem making the 6:05, and I have time to go and get lunch. Schlepped the bags back to the Tercel and hit Red Robin.

Sat Feb 24, 2018 11:30am

No problem getting to Watertown International Airport (!), Watertown, NY. The 84 Tercel performed flawlessly - meaning it started. My flight to PHL is at 1:00, and from PHL to Vegas at 6:05.

Almost immediately the flight changed from 1:00 to 2:00 and back to 1:00.

Sat Feb 24, 2018 10:00am

Woke at 4:40am, 5:30am, 5:57am, 6:22am, 6:48am - and that one stuck. Had a leisurely panic and hit the road at 10:00am. On my way!