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Tuesday, October 16, 2018

The Purple Chip Trip

I was talking to my buddy, confidant, and best technical wizard pal Jimmy Poon the other day.

"Jimmy Poon," I said, "I need a new goal for this next solo Vegas trip. Something I've never done before.

"Win," said Jimmy Poon. His high-pitched squeal of a laugh reverberated around the Royal Canadian Veeblefetzer lunch room, where I slave for The Man making the same size 7 grommet 10,000 times a day, over and over again.

Jimmy Poon is older than he looks. He's very thin, his cheeks sinking in like fallen yorkshire puddings. His hair is always brushed back away from his forehead, puffed up Elvis style. Jimmy Poon's eyes are bright, though, and whatever his age, his wisdom and geeky know-how are just as potent as ever.

"Keep the blog site running and leave the funny to me, Jimmy Poon," I said, wagging a Flusher finger at him.

"What's the most you've ever taken off a table game in Vegas, Flusher?"

"A little over $300, Jimmy Poon. Not very much. Not enough. Not sure why."

"It's because you have no balls. It's because you don't press it to the limit, parlay to the far play, you shunny the money. Have you ever stuck with a hot streak and won a $500 purple chip?"

"I've never even seen one, Jimmy Poon. At least, one that wasn't in the house's rack."


"Great idea, Jimmy Poon. My goal for this trip to Las Vegas is to win my first purple chip!"

And with that, I find myself on a Via rail train from Flusherville Station to Toronto Union, $2.25 coffee sliding around on the completely inadequate table-ette, and still half of the meat sandwich I brought along (because cheap) to enjoy.

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