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Saturday, December 29, 2018

Clumping Royals

Over at Main Street Station, we headed to the corner, whereupon a woman hit a nickel Royal Flusher. Holding just one card. I congratulated her and mentally kicked her in the shins.

"That's amazing. Pretty hard to hit a Royal from one."

Grunt, said the lady.

"Never hit a Royal from one," I said.

Humph, said the lady.

"Go fuck yourself," I said.

Grumph, said the lady.

OK, I did not say to the grunt lady go fuck yourself. But she did not want to talk to me, and that's fine. Not many do.

The Quad Queen opted for triple play quarters, but I though I'd be conservative and slipped $20 into triple play Slutty Times Pay Double Double Bonus.

In no time at all, I'd hit my first quad. I didn't bother with a photo. Just a little 250 nickel quad.

Then I hit Pointies. No spinner though.

In another couple of minutes, I hit a third quad. No picture.

And then, out of the fucking blue, a miracle.

A Royal Flush From One Card.

YES YES YES! My first royal in a year and a half, and my first royal on nickels ever.

Oh man that felt good, I had finally lived up to my name again!

The quads continued almost immediately, with 2s kicker, just a minute or two after my royal flush.

Kids, brace yourselves... ten minutes after the first royal, I hit another. (Okay, I checked the pics and it was 12 minutes. But I sat and admired the royal for a good 4 or 5 minutes.)

I cashed out $500 from $20 in, had 9 quads, and 2 royals in about an hour.

That, my friends, is some savvy video pokering.

For the first time, I have a nickel royal. For the first time, I have a royal from one card. And for the first time, I have two royals in the same day, in the same session, ten minutes apart.

And even better... I won today. By about $526. And the Quad Queen lost less than that, so today, for the first time this trip, we gained ground. And that feels good.


    1. Regarding your attempt at renewing your ITIN. If you want to go to an IRS office you have to make an appointment, and the appointments are almost impossible to get. Your best bet is to get a certified copy of your passport from the passport office and send that in with your application. I renewed mine early this year and after a lot of failed attempts at other methods it was the best option, although it will cost you around $50 CDN. Keep the reports coming. Regards A.P.

      1. I did make an appointment successfully. It took me 70 minutes on the phone but I managed it. I think we would have been fine if not for the shutdown.

    2. Congrats, but nickel royals really bum me out.


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