I knew it was time to leave Las Vegas and head for home because I was out of coffee to feed the Little Giant. You have to tune in to these sorts of signs.
The blog writing went very well, with the characterization of the Luxor parking garage kiosk as an evil Deus Ex Machina that didn't put things right, it put things wrong. I also got to include a lot of foul language, which pleased me to no end.
My final breakfast awaited at the counter at the Cal coffee shop.
Nobody ever shops for coffee there, I'm not sure why it's called that.
The counter was full, so I waited in the unofficial but traditional waiting spot, along with another guy. We waited. And we waited.
Finally, someone got up, and I got all excited - but they were just headed back for round 8 of the breakfast buffet.
Ten minutes passed. Then fifteen.
Then I remembered that I didn't have my meal book. Swift thinking saved the day - I texted the Quad Queen and instructed her to bring it. She said to ping her when I was nearly done.
I said to the guy, "Let's go hover over them, and say stuff like 'you gonna finish that?'"
Twenty minutes. This was unprecedented.
"You know what's going to happen..." I pontificated. "Everybody's going to leave at the same time."
And that's exactly how it went down once Hawaiian Guy and I were seated, side by each. (That means next to one another.)
There was a sense of awkwardness, as we sat side by side at an otherwise empty dozen or so seat counter. It was the same kind of awkwardness as when you pull up to a middle urinal in a line of 30 at the stadium and another guy comes in and pulls up (and out) righhhhhhht next to you.
The awkwardness wasn't quite as bad though, because neither of us had our hot dogs out.
The Quad Queen appeared and I introduced her to Hawaiian Guy.
"I want you to meet my breakfast mate here..." I said. "This guy, is bad luck. He made us wait for 20 minutes and then emptied the place."
There was much chuckling between the three of us. Oh, my, how we chuckled. It must have gone on for 2-3 seconds.
We had some stuff on the agenda, such as a mini coupon run on the way to the Four Queens.
An incredibly generous soul, Casey, hit the Donate button and forked out $100!!! Thank you Casey!!!
But, there were instructions, which were pretty cool. We were to find the $5 Wheel of Meat machine in the Four Queens (one of two actually) that has a reputation for paying out, and play the hundred on that. I would do that gladly!
First stop, though, was Binions, to do some coupons.
I have to say, the woman that took care of me was just excellent. Her badge named her as Supervisor of the slot club, and she was just fantastic. There are good people around, that's for sure. I even gave her a business card.
For the second time in two visits, the Quad Queen showed up as a new player, so she got all the new player stuff again. A bit of free play - plus we each had $10 from the LVA booklets.
We went and played and neither of us kept anything much. QQ wanted to get her 20 points to get $10 more free play and put some money in to hammer away at Boner Deluxe. After a while, she needed a pit stop, so she told me to play in her place.
"This thing is going to pay off. It's trying to deal quads!" she said.
Within a minute, I'd run her credits down to zero.
I put five bucks in and played some more and looky!
Damn straight. And because it was my money for the stake, I kept the quad winnings. Alternatively, if I had hit the quad while on her stake money, I would have kept the quad winnings.
She got her points, got her free play, and hit a quad, and left the place even.
Meanwhile, I relaxed and felt good about turning five bucks into a hundred. I kind of wandered around a bit and stashed a card in a very secure location for very entertaining trip reporter notfromconcentrate to find, who would be in town just after we left.
Next stop, the Four Queens, where we wanted to have one last bash at the 9/6 Jacks.
Well what do you know, that five bucks from Binions continued to grow!
I knew which one of the Wheel of Meat machines I wanted to play - and it was out of order.
So we played the other one. We had a system. I put $100 in, and the Quad Queen played all the spins.
Here is a visual record of our incredible run on that machine.
We didn't win a fucking dime, but I am still very grateful to Casey for the generous donation - I got to do something I probably wouldn't have done on my own. I wish I had a great story to tell about it, but that's gambling.
Not to be denied, I hit up a quarter slot and got a decent win on it.
Next stop, the Mikes Bar, where I struggled, and the Quad Queen hit a bunch of quads.
I never did hit anything, but the Quad Queen balanced me - and I still had a couple of hundred of Binions money to play on.
And there were more goodies to be had, too. We both picked up cash back money at the slot club ($42 for me and $62 for her) and did our $10 free play coupons to boot.
You can have this swag and the hammer, or you can have the cashback, but you can't have both. What's it going to be? |
Maybe a 500 game Keno ticket was the answer?
>>I also got to include a lot of foul language, which pleased me to no end.<< Yeah, that's true - but you use that language with such creative flair & wit, nobody could possibly be offended. We're too busy laughing!!
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