The First Man on Moon Vegas

Moon Vegas is kind of... well, other than it being out of this world, it's kind of busy.

I may have slightly miscalculated on being the first human being here, but that doesn't mean that the mission isn't a huge success.

The moment that the world was waiting for was at hand - the moment where I would step off the jetway and take humankind's first step onto an alien world, hopefully one with plenty of full pay action.

Then I made my way down the Kegel's short passageway, winking at the flight attendant as I passed.

"See you when I'm done exploring!" I said.

"Godspeed, Commander Flushiepants!"

With some trepidation, and a full bladder, I was wishing I'd taken Capcom's advice to stir the tanks or whatever that was.

The Kegel's hatch had been opened by the flight attendant, and I took a deep breath and perched on the edge, turning around on the 'porch' as it were, ready to take the first step backwards onto Moon Vegas.

I reached out with one foot, and felt my toe touch this strange, distant world. Humankind had left the bosom of Mother Earth and slipped her surly bonds, or whatever. I took a few steps and found myself in front of a slot machine. What the heck, I'd come a long way!

"That's... one small bet for man - one... giant spin for mankind."

Words immortalized forever more.

Commander Flusher on the Moon

Ready to explore, I grabbed the expedition equipment out of the hold.

The good ship Moonar Lander Kegel at Futility Base

With my gear offloaded from the Kegel moonar lander, I set about using the Moonar Roving Vehicle - or MRV - also known by Capcom, Flight, and most astronauts as the Lyft - to strike out and explore the area near my landing site.

First stop, Luxor - where somehow, even though I'm supposedly the first person on Moon Vegas, there's quite the hotel and casino present, much of it shaped like a 30 story pyramid.

I didn't care much - it was bound to be a better place to explore from than the cramped quarters of the Kegel.