Because of Me

When your budget has taken a shitkicking, it's nice to have some mad money backed with creative accounting to make things seem better than they really are.

Day 6

After such a good day with the video keno hand pay, I'd suffered a $700 sophomore jinx. I needed help.

Fortunately, I'd received two generous donations for just such a purpose on this trip, totalling $120.

From T.K., $100 "Secret Super Spy Karma Donation - for Gambling and Drinking only!" and from E.S., $21 earmarked "Emergency Spy Who Felted Me bankroll money".

Because this was gift money, I figured I should be able to play it, but not count it toward my $300 stake. I'd still take the $300, and have $120 on top, but it wouldn't count against losses.

This made perfect sense to me in such desperate times.

"I figure I should have an extra $120 today that doesn't count against losses. Because I was gifted that money for my hard work on the blog," I explained to the Quad Queen.

She said nothing, so I continued with my reasoning.

"People love what I do, therefore they give -"

She had her hands on her hips. Perhaps a spot of trouble?

"You're doing the Olympic stance?" I asked.

"Superman stance."

"So why do I have donations?"

"Because of me," she said. "The only reason you're out here is because of me. It's about me."

"Oh, because they like - what do they like, the Quad Queen, is that it?"

"Yeahhh, the Quad Queen"

"So, they don't like me?" I asked.

"They like your writing," she replied, "...about the Quad Queen.

The $120 was already in my wallet. I'd deal with the accounting later. My plan, carefully constructed, was to gamble it. Specifically on dollar full pay 9/6 Jacks or Better coin droppers in the Cal lobby, right by the big-gutted guy whose huge belly everyone rubs. The wooden Buddha statue is also there.

The Jacks machines were all occupied, so we adjusted to probably an even better plan - dollar coin dropper Treasure Chest. I stared with the lucky E.S. $20.

First hand, got a pair of Kings. So far not losing!

That was followed by three losers... and on the Lazarus hand, dealt three Kings. Could this be the bankroll reboot I was looking for?

No it could not.

The next hand was a dud.

I played on, receiving a series of steaming piles of unsuited crap. But just to twist the knife, the Quad Queen popped four of a kind.

This is the way it ended for me.

This is the way it ended for the Quad Queen.

Thank you E.S. - I think the important thing here is not that I was a pungent back-alley losing smell loser, but I led the Quad Queen to coin-dropper riches.

I love casinos.

We had two Las Vegas Advisor coupon books, as well as the American Casino Guide coupons - most of which I hadn't used yet. We embarked on the first foray into our match play attempts.

We decided that for the most part, we'd play roulette, and we'd always bet on red. Then we decided on black. Then we switched back to red, because they'd be expecting us to bet black. But knowing that they would try to pull a fast one, so we switched to black, then red, then black and finally we agreed once and for all to always, always bet red. Or black.

In this case, red was a winner, and we both came away with $20 profit.

Those two Double Super Times Pay single line machines beckoned and I slipped in T.K.'s Secret Super Spy Karma Donation $100. The video poker wasn't working for me, so I moved to the machine just behind the QQ and switched to.... dime keno.

But the Quad Queen managed a hit, and then I managed yet another five out of five.

Woohoo!! Now my bankroll had a real, legit boost that I didn't have to do any fancy-ass accounting tricks for. Thank you T.K.!!!

Now that I was up for the day, I could hold my head high and take the scenic escalator ride down into Main Street Station. Because we had plans.