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Monday, June 25, 2012

You Gotta Know When They Hold 'Em

With the trip entering the beginning of the start of the latter part of the end, we were kind of in a groove here but still, we knew there are lots of surprises, victories, and defeats still to come.

It was blistering hot, hitting 108F during the heat of the day. It's a searing killer heat (but a dry searing killer heat).

The morning session (with latte) was pretty good for me - I hit four quads including Aces (again on the wrong machine...) for $100.

Mrs. Flusher hit one on dollars, and so it was that after 2 hours play, and me being about even on the day, we went on walkabout.

Pick'em at the Fremont was particularly brutal. I lost $180 in what seemed like no time. We headed to the El Cortez where I cashed in my second $5 certificate for free play. Lost a bit here and there, lost $80 on blackjack, made back $80 on dollar Bonus Deluxe (no quads) saw them filming something in the Parlour bar and talked to Scott the bartender there about this and that.

I gave him a Royal Flusher card, so now he will be able to pour me the premium liquor.

The Joker in Joker Wild creeps me out. I'd kick him out of my house party.
In true Quad Queen fashion, she hit four 5s on Bonus Deluxe for $200 while I continued to lose money.

We headed to the D-itz hoping to see Sigma Derby going in, but no such luck. There is no sign of it.

But there IS a Bone-a-rama going on. (Or is that at Drink and Drag?)

Lunch was the delicious chicken, but again, they fucked with it.

Everything I find and love, they fuck with, whether its the Binions burger or the Colonel can go fuck himself fried chicken. The good news is, they may have improved it in the sense that it is a bit lighter on the batter, and definitely less salty.

The saltiness of the old recipe could make you pucker tighter than a choir boy.

Keno again proved a bust. We've dumped hundreds into that stupid game and have yet to win more than a handful of dollars. We must be stupid! And yet, it is my go-to game for when I can't win at anything else. Because I can play it in the room. And drink. And it doesn't take any effort, except to get another drink.

But just once - ONCE - I'd like to get all the numbers on my ticket, even if it is just 3 or 4. I may start playing single number Keno tickets just for the joy of ticking the box.

We played the best paytable machine downtown - lone nickel loose deuces at the D-itz.*
*Sadly, now retired from the floor. R.F. 2016

After schlepping into the Four Queens, I felt tired. Really tired. Super-fatigued. But Mrs. F. wanted to play 100 play. So I indulged her. And we played. I kept piling onto my losses.

I was pretty much falling asleep in the chair and wanting to go back to the room, get hammered, lose on Keno, and sleep. Yeah, I was down about $400 on the day at this point.

My lucky Double Diamond slot even let me down.

So we schlepped through the heat to ABC store. The only good thing about the day, besides the chicken, was getting to tell three timeshare bitches in a row to take a long hard suck on my big fat one when they got in my way, trying to sell me on their evil useless wares.

I mean, I'm all in at this point. Broke, feel like crap. Got water and Coke at ABC and then went for liquor.

Except Mrs. Flusher insisted that the Russian Plonk Vodka was $3 cheaper at the Main Street gift shop than the California gift shop.

Okay, so I indulged her. Sure, we can walk the extra block or two in the searing, killing heat. I did it without complaint.

We bought a bottle of Thinpainter Vodplonka and a small bottle of Jack for me, for variety.

"Let's play a $20 in Treasure Chest," she says.

I'm ready to crash I'm so beat. Maybe a bug she had a couple of days ago...

"Sure," I indulged. "I have one $20 bill left in my stake."

We each played quarter Treasure Chest. Mrs. Flusher's twenty went particularly fast.

"I'm going to the other side," she said, ditching me.

Fine. I kept playing, maybe 6 or 7 hands and then I heard her voice from the other side of the bank of machines.

"I got a royal," she said.

"That's great kid... don't get cocky!" I replied.

That's when I remembered that the other side of the bank isn't quarters. It's dollars.

Ho-lee shit!!!!

She really knocked it out of the park!

Not only was it her first ever dollar Royal, it was DEALT. A FOUR THOUSAND DOLLAR HAND DEALT!!!

I did a quick calculation in my head and figured that it was about a 1 in 650,000 shot to get a dealt royal.

She reports that unlike the other dealt royal this trip, the cards were displayed one at a time, but were displayed held. When the fifth card was up, the Jackpot / Call Attendant messages came up.

It took a little while to do the paperwork and after 30% tax withholding (a nice thank you to all the Canadian gambling tourists from Uncle Sam) she had $2800 added to her stake.

I have to say, this trip has exceeded all expectations in the Royal department. Between the two of us, we've had SIX of them. It's absolutely insane, beautiful, extremely lucky, and very savvy and Zipperless.

We had some drinks in the room to hash over the win and my fatigue disappeared. I cleaned up with a long shower and shave and a change of pants (always a strong gambling move) and we had a lovely dinner on points in the Redwood Grille.

In this case, lovely means an entire cow carcass served up on your plate. Pretty much.

Redwood Grille's 192oz Prime Rib portion hits the spot!

 After, I managed to recover some dough by clearing $100 profit on an $80 buy-in at blackjack.

Oh, and Mrs. Flusher had a very nice 'almost' hand on $2 VP:

By the numbers... I'm down a bit on the trip after a LOT of action... but does it matter that much, considering?

Royal Flusher down $320 on the day, down $120 on the trip.
Quad Queen up $2740 on the day, up $2270 on the trip.

Combined... we are up $2170 on the trip. It is very Zipperless and avengeful!

Just a couple more days to go... can we hold on? And what will tomorrow bring?


    1. Awesome royal flush...nice blog. I love the video poker pics.

    2. Very nice hit for the Mrs.

    3. Hey Flusher, I too was dealt a $1 royal this past weekend in AC. Mine was a bit better as it was sequential and paid $4350. I hit two royals in one night (a first for me). The other was for a mere $2,000. Nice to see the vp gods shining down on both of us simultaneously.

    4. Awesome Hit!! I know you guys play a lot over almost two weeks time, but 6 royals is awesome and this last one on Dollars is the best! Minus the taxes, I think your ahead from the huge losses from your trip several months ago. keep it going!!


    5. I wasn't aware of the tax thing for Canadians. Effin bullshit just effin bullshit on what is, over the long run, a losing game. Fuck the IRS and the stupid tax code they live by.

    6. Congrats on Mrs. F's royal. On Sunday, 24 June, I was dealt a quarter royal at the El Cortez. Playing downtown is the best!


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