No wonder they had seats DEF.
Wheels down, I checked my phone to see what time it was... 11:11. Could this be some sort of an omen? Where could I find a video poker machine that could deal quad 1s?
We'd set up with Presidential as usual, and the guy was there waiting. We'd booked a stretch limo - because you always want to arrive at the Four Queens in style.
In fact, limos can't even pull up to the front door at the FQ porte cochone, because it is so tiny.
In the stretch's place they sent an Escalade decked out in the latest pink and purple porno motif. I hopped in, we popped the champagne and I felt like I was Behind the Green Door, Pile Driving Miss Daisy.
We arrived - home at last! - and got our room assigned, but of course, it wasn't cleaned yet, since it was barely noon. So we had to ditch the luggage for later pickup. This gets pricey - $5 tip on drop-off and $5 tip on pick-up. But it had to be, because we had bidness!
And so, we embarked on the next part of our gambling journey, committing to the dollar jacks machines. The moments of truth were at hand and we would see if we could fade the variance. (That's gambling lingo for 'see if we would get fucked sideways or not').
We hung in there for a full hour without getting bent or hurt, (I got the first quad of the trip!) and then trundled off to Magnolias. I must continually remind readers that photographs of the country fried steak with throw-up gravy consistently look worse than they really are.
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| Chicken-fried steak with patented glue-like country throw-up gravy. |
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| Magnolia's prides itself on its salad dressing portion sizes. |
After lunch, we headed back to work at the Jacks.
I had to chuckle - after chiding Linda Boyd in my review of her book where she said 'it's not like they put signs up in the casino telling you where the better machines are' and I said 'oh yeah?' and posted a picture of the Four Queen's 'play 6/9 jacks here' signs - because those signs are gone. (They've since returned.)
They've re-done the carpeting in the place (as of last week) and so I guess the signs went away then.
The carpeting is beautiful. They've managed to find a weave that exactly matches the Four Queen's carefully concocted color scheme of gold, red, blue, white, purple, green, black, and magenta.
And now, the day's cavalcade of quads:
After two more hours - yes we survived! - of dollar Jacks, with lots of quads, we ambled over to the Mikes bar for a happy re-union.
Big Mike greeted me with one of his patented 6-way handshakes. I got mixed up partway through and ended up grabbing his ear by mistake. All those finger snaps and thumb twiddles and explosions and stuff in the fancy handshake get me all mixed up. I promised to practice for next time.
Our room was ready and we headed upstairs. It's a pretty standard Four Queens room, except less so, with crappy repairs, no fan in the bathroom, broken this and that in the bath and tile... I'm kind of getting tired of it.
I had to chuckle - after chiding Linda Boyd in my review of her book where she said 'it's not like they put signs up in the casino telling you where the better machines are' and I said 'oh yeah?' and posted a picture of the Four Queen's 'play 6/9 jacks here' signs - because those signs are gone. (They've since returned.)
They've re-done the carpeting in the place (as of last week) and so I guess the signs went away then.
The carpeting is beautiful. They've managed to find a weave that exactly matches the Four Queen's carefully concocted color scheme of gold, red, blue, white, purple, green, black, and magenta.
And now, the day's cavalcade of quads:
After two more hours - yes we survived! - of dollar Jacks, with lots of quads, we ambled over to the Mikes bar for a happy re-union.
Big Mike greeted me with one of his patented 6-way handshakes. I got mixed up partway through and ended up grabbing his ear by mistake. All those finger snaps and thumb twiddles and explosions and stuff in the fancy handshake get me all mixed up. I promised to practice for next time.
Our room was ready and we headed upstairs. It's a pretty standard Four Queens room, except less so, with crappy repairs, no fan in the bathroom, broken this and that in the bath and tile... I'm kind of getting tired of it.
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| Room service? That means an even larger vat o' dressing. |
A quick accounting showed that after a combined 6 hours of dollar VP I was up $30 and the Quad Queen was up $200.
"This gambling stuff is easy!" I remarked, followed by, "It's so easy, I never have to worry about letting my guard down, because we'll always win from now on!!!"
After a rest for us weary travelers, we went back down to complete our target dollar play.
I had not one but two 'four-to-a-royal' draws - but obviously, I failed to press the button very well, or you'd have heard about it.
In fact, the last session sucked keno balls. When we finished our gambling day I was down $300 and the Queen down $200. You can get hurt fast on dollars if the quads and fulls house ain't showin'.
We consoled ourselves with room service for dinner (some sort of horrid chicken breast melt sandwich swiss fries thing for me and Cobb salad for her). The free downtown internet wasn't cutting it for uploading pictures of glue-covered meat and fours of a kind so I splurged and paid for net access. And did some blogging, which you read up on last night and this morning.
So that's where day 1 of the Spirit of Savvy ended.
R.F. down $300 trip on $4816 coin in
Q.Q. down $200 trip on $6048 coin in
*Roam Mobility went in the dumper, not recommended any longer.
"This gambling stuff is easy!" I remarked, followed by, "It's so easy, I never have to worry about letting my guard down, because we'll always win from now on!!!"
After a rest for us weary travelers, we went back down to complete our target dollar play.
I had not one but two 'four-to-a-royal' draws - but obviously, I failed to press the button very well, or you'd have heard about it.
In fact, the last session sucked keno balls. When we finished our gambling day I was down $300 and the Queen down $200. You can get hurt fast on dollars if the quads and fulls house ain't showin'.
We consoled ourselves with room service for dinner (some sort of horrid chicken breast melt sandwich swiss fries thing for me and Cobb salad for her). The free downtown internet wasn't cutting it for uploading pictures of glue-covered meat and fours of a kind so I splurged and paid for net access. And did some blogging, which you read up on last night and this morning.
So that's where day 1 of the Spirit of Savvy ended.
R.F. down $300 trip on $4816 coin in
Q.Q. down $200 trip on $6048 coin in
*Roam Mobility went in the dumper, not recommended any longer.
Best of luck to you and QQ. Have a great trip and keep the posts coming, I enjoy reading them!.
ReplyDeleteSince the comments are moderated, you can delete this part, but the coin-in numbers must be off? The post says more than 6 hours of $1 Jacks which would work out to something like 350 hands per hour combined or 175 hph each, which is glacially slow.
Hi Anonymous, thanks for your comment. (Jimmy doesn't know how to delete parts of comments, they either show up intact, or they don't.)
ReplyDeleteThe 366 hand an hour number is pretty slow for us but we are tippy-toeing around the machine, playing very carefully. Plus there are breaks for picture taking, drinks, washroom, and general tomfoolery.
Mrs. F is certainly capable of 1000 hph or even move on a well-greased slant top.
Thank God for another Flusher TR. Those bums over at VMB were putting me to sleep with their boring tales of High Limit play and fancy smancy suites I can't afford. Hoping for lots of tales of Quads, Royals, max comps, and sticking it too the man!
ReplyDeleteKeep the reports coming just back from Vegas myself. Two nights at the HRH.
ReplyDeleteLost 300.00 but got the room comped. passed out amazon gift card to my favorite waitresses and host!!