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Thursday, February 17, 2022

Ruby Tiger Osceola - The Slot Machines Are That Way!

The slot machines are that way, said the statue of Seminole matriarch Ruby Tiger Osceola located in the walkway the parking lot and the Seminole Hard Rock Casino in Tampa. 

I had many questions. Why was Ruby Tiger shown with a bear? And who were the nice looking flatlander people surrounding her in but two dimensions?

These and other important questions would never be answered - there was gambling to be had, and had it we would!!!

Ruby Tiger Osceola and the Flatlander Singers

Just 'how did it come to be that Royal Flusher and the Quad Queen were about to embark upon casino gambling in Tampa, and why did it take so long?' nobody asked.

The Quad Queen got laid off into retirement in summer 2020. We bought a manufactured palace home in the Grand Floridian Greacey Palms Senior Putt Putt Trailer Park over the internet a few months later. I, Sir Flushiepants, retired in May 2021. And we made our way to Florida last November.

And here we've been, soaking up the sun, and working our tails off.

It's not all putting greens and bikinis here in the swamp. We've had an issue with water magically appearing under the house, typically after a spell of rainy weather. Jimmy Poon, who is in charge of all things smart connected with the blog, did a careful analysis and figured out that what we need is a BFT.

"What you need is a BFT, Royal," said Jimmy Poon.

"A Big Fucking Trench, Jimmy Poon?" I replied to Jimmy Poon.

"BFD - not BFT, Royal. A Big French Drain."

Now, the hardest way to install a French drain is to make sure it runs for 50 or 60 feet and to dig it by hand with shovels and such. Additionally, all this should be done without a wheelbarrow.

So that's exactly what we've done.

Tailings from the trench.

It's now complete. It drains from the middle of the house sloping away in both directions, to the road, and out the back, where there is a good drop-off onto the mini-putt course.

And last fall, we ripped out all of the scraggly so-called 'hedges' and the 6" of mulch, muck, rot, and crap that were trapping water and stinking up the place.

We also fixed some issues with roof drainage. Gutters should not slope to the middle of the house, they should slope to the corners. Seems obvious, but $685 we have a fix.

Anyway, I've had plenty of shovel time and back-breaking work since we got here, but the big job is now done, and hopefully, our water issues will be fixed.

And that means there's a bit more time to relax and play! To the Hard Rock!

Did I bury the lead again? I promise, blistering keno action will happen - in the next post. Right now, Mr. Greacey has warmed up the above ground pool, and I have a date with an inflatable rubber ducky and a pool noodle.

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