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Saturday, June 9, 2012

Vegas Revenge - Part 2 the Sequel 3: Avenged - The Final Conflict

As you may recall, last November I took the most non-savvy rogering in the ass I've ever taken in Vegas. Those nasty casinos took me for about $3000 over 2 weeks. It was not pretty and by far and away the worst result I've ever had. Fortunately I had an amazing time doing it, but honestly, it's almost as if the gambling corporations don't want you to win. They just want to roger you in the ass.

If you're interested, the Gory Details of the 40th Trip are here.

Well, I swore revenge. I didn't know whether that mean killing a man with the buffet mashed potato scoop, stealing a fortune in hotel matches, cocktail napkins, and swizzle sticks, or vaguely sullying the casinos' reputations with choice words on the internet.

Ultimately I decided against culinary manslaughter and went for the more satisfying option of taking it out of their hides in the only way they could understand - winning back my money.

And by Grommet, last month I did just that, clearing some $250 (and about a sweet thousand in comps) from their evil coffers and into my own evil coffers after a nine-day drunken extravaganza in what some call Mecca, some call the Promised Land, but I call the Mecca Promised Land of Las Vegas.

And you know what?

I'm not done.

I have unfinished business. In no particular order:

First off, Loco Moco for breakfast at the Fremont (shout out to Stu who won't let me be until I sample this delight).


That's Loco Moco - rice, hamburger patty, brown gravy-style ooze, and eggs atop. Beauty!
I'll find out in about a week.

I'm 5000 points short of Gold status on MGM-Mirage's MILFE card. I can't wait to see the level of my Excalibur comps once I hit that milestone.

I need to win a shitload of money. At least 3 grand. I haven't had a dollar Royal Flush since about 1998. I'm due.

I'd like to win a super-shitload of money some time. Like 20 large.

I need to cadge as many of Mrs. Flusher's super-comps at the Four Queens as I can - they threw in room service for cryin' out loud.

Need to one-up Jimmy Poon's last souvenir of a plastic hotty big-boobed woman on a mug mug. Why not, it makes him happy, and he bailed me out big time.

Drinking the alphabet looms large. A is for Absolut... B is for Beer... C is for Cinzano... D is for Daquiri...

Try out the Chicago Brewing Company's bartops, it may be a sweet place to play.

Last trip I didn't get Aces with kicker on Double Double Bonus, I didn't eat the fried chicken at Fitzgeralds The D, and I didn't get quad deuces on Deuces Wild. I also didn't eat a Binion's cheeseburger. I need to confirm if they really did lower the standards last summer.

And oh my, I didn't even win FREE MEAT at the Fitz-D. What is going on???

And there is so much, much more... play the Lion's Share at MGM, do some play at T.I. on 50 cent machines to rake in some offers, set up some Whoopee cushions in the high limit room at Wynn.*

So the trip is on! Mrs. Flusher is winging her way to M.P.L.L.V. as I type this on the Video Poker WinSimulator 3000 featuring WinPoker.

She's there for a week, and I'm heading out next Saturday.

Later tonight I'm getting a call live from Mrs. Flusher and we are going to be playing some dollar Video Poker together, split the proceeds - so I might start winning before I even get there! How can this possibly go wrong???

I'll be sending out a bit more information live this time via Twitter and Facebook, as well as doing the daily recaps with all the highs, lows, and possibly drunken vomiting.

Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/royalflusher

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/royalflushervegas

*This idea would come to juicy fruition in the Hallo'wynn Trip.





    1 comment:

    1. I'm waiting in anguish Mr. F! What you don't know about devouring 'the Moco' is that it has magical gambling powers. Personally, I have never lost at VP afterwards, nor have I been able to eat dinner on the same day. If I might suggest it, the pick'em poker is right outside the door and if you have the budget, the super times pay bonus poker at quarters can be a fine play. And best of all, both are located about 3 feet from the bar where the old ladies (GILFS) pick up the drink orders.

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