Monday, January 22, 2018

Glossary of Royal Flusher Gambling Terms - part 2

Blue Skadoo: Gambling buddy and long-time blog supporter.

Bonebook: An illegal knock-off of an Asus Chromebook that Jimmy Poon somehow ‘located’ and gave to me.

Boner Pokus: Bonus Poker video poker game.

BEEEFFFAALOOOO!!!!!!!!!: Buffalo penny video slot game.

Bunions: Binions Hotel and Casino.

Button Fuck: Winning a lot of money in a short time playing machines at a casino. “I totally button-fucked the Downtown Grand when I pulled down two Aces progressives on $10 of freeplay!” “Savvy.”

(The) Cal: The California Hotel and Casino.

Chef Ian: Friend of mine named Ian Opoulusopoulus, who runs the Flusherville Beanery.

Coin dropper: A video poker machine that pays out in coins, not TITOs.

Coin in: Total of all the money bet on all the spins/draws/button pushes on slots and video poker

Coin out: Total of all the money won on all the spins/draws/button pushes on slots and video poker

Colonel Sanders Can Go Fuck Himself This Is The Best Fried Chicken Ever: Amazing freshly made fried chicken that they used to make at Fitzgeralds. Not anymore, the Colonel is safe.
Also known as the "Dixie Lee, Popeye, and Mary Brown, can all have a three-way and smoke the Colonel's white meat, this is the best fried chicken I've ever tasted" fried chicken.
C.S.C.G.F.H.T.I.T.B.F.C.E. fried chicken.
Comp: Complimentary. Something of value that savvy gamblers get for free from the casino after losing about five times what the comp is worth, and ten times what the comp costs the casino.


Clumping: Fairly rare events that tend to happen in groups. I’ve observed that quads clump, as well as Royals.

Dead Man’s Hand: pair of Aces and a pair of Eights.

Degen, Degenerate: Indulging in bad gambling habits, such as playing higher stakes in desperation when losing badly. An excess of consumption or activity to the detriment of one’s physical or fiscal well-being. Carrying on without any self-respect (i.e. having a great time). Opposite of savvy. “I won $600 and on my way to the room for the night, I went totally degen and blew it all on $25 a hand VP in about two minutes.”

Dickscalibur: Excalibur Hotel and Casino. Also Dickscabular.

Dinq: The Linq Hotel and Casino (formerly the Quad and super-formerly the Old Iperooski).

Divana: My sister, who wears feather boas and floats from pose to pose without anyone ever seeing her move. See The Forbidden Shaolin Upper Cannon Punch Mobius Fold.

Doghouse: Full house of Kings and Nines.

Double Dogs: Pair of Kings, Pair of Nines.

Double Gretzky: Quad 9s.

Double Puppies: Pair of Kings, Pair of Threes.

Dr. Raoul Shiboubou: One of my cousins from Manitoba who raises purebred penguins. Son of Gambletron.

Emergency Cheese: Cheese portions that you bring along as a last-chance snack for when you get hungry. Quickly devolves into Punishment Cheese.
Punishment Cheese.
Emergency Nuts: Mixed nuts in a ziploc for when you need a quick bite but are too hungover to leave your room. Also, part of Punishment Lunch or Dinner.

Favorite Server Judy: A very nice cocktail waitress who worked at the California Hotel and Casino. She’s no longer employed there.

Flusher, Flush: Royal Flusher.

Flushiepants: Royal Flusher. Term coined by Blue Skadoo.

Gordie Howe: Bringer of great gambling luck, if you have his card in your wallet. Also, played hockey.

Fork Weens: The Four Queens Hotel and Casino.

Handpay, Handy: A jackpot that is paid in cash by a casino floorperson. Also, handy: manual jackpot.

Hundy: A one hundred dollar bill. Currency that is electrostatically charged so as to fly out of my wallet.

ISG Island Senior Girlfriend: A sweet, poised, elderly Hawaiian lady at the Cal, MSS, and Fremont. See The Man With Two Senior Hawaiian Girlfriends.

Gambletron, Tron: One of my Manitoba cousins, father of Dr. Raoul Shiboubou.

Jacks: Jacks or Better video poker.

Jackson Five: Quad Jacks with a 5 kicker.

The Jackson Five
Kevin: An extremely savvy gambling buddy of mine.

Lamondo: my beloved, artistic niece. Divana’s daughter.

Lonnie Lo: Famous musician. Leader of Lonnie Lo and the Golden Showers Love Orchestra. Learn more at The Rarest Vintage Vinyl LP Records You've Never Seen.


Lucksore: Luxor Hotel and Casino. Also Luxhole, Luxsore, Licksore, Lacks-soul. And maybe we should add The Pointy.

Lyftber: Ride share company e.g. Lyft, Uber.

Mandalay Pay: Mandalay Bay Hotel and Casino.

MGM Green, MGM Greed: MGM Grand Hotel and Casino. 

Monty Charcoal: The Monte Carlo Hotel and Casino, so named after its roof caught fire.

Morgue: Video poker hand of Aces full of Eights. See also Dead Man’s Hand.

Part 3 yet to come. Stay tuna!

BACK TO PART 1

CONTINUED IN PART 3


4 comments:

  1. Damn, that chicken looks tasty!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Clumping is just a paying day. Which is also noticeable by the use of the atm on the losing days.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Technically, the dead man's had is black Aces and Eights.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did not know that! So Aces and Eights with any red cards are the Mortally Wounded's Hand.

      Delete

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