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Friday, January 26, 2018

Glossary of Royal Flusher Gambling Terms - part 3

Let's continue sorting out some of the things you might have read in the trip reports with part 3 of the Glossary.

Dinner for Four: VP hand of 6, 9, 6, 9, x.

Flusherville Regional Aerodrome: The airfield from which I take the single-engined Curtiss-Wright Beechfokker Industrie Ditchmaster Flea-flicker Flameliner Tiger Moth Mark 2 Constellation a la Mode (Stretch Version) to Pearson in Toronto. Sometimes this aircraft is replaced with a refurbed Reapertech Airstream II Cannonball Express Bi-Motor Switchcraft 44A.

Reapertech Airstream II Cannonball Express Bi-Motor Switchcraft 44A in Air FU Canada livery.
Happy Video Poker Orgasm Music: The cheesy but delightful climactic music that plays on some machines when you hit a Royal Flush, particularly if there is a hand pay involved.. There is more than one version of the music - the example below is from one of the oldest type of machine.

And here's the newer version of the Happy Video Poker Orgasm Music - with 98% more walking bass.

Left-B-Hind Kennels: The kennel where Chippy stays while we galavant around Vegas.

Licorice Petey: Legendary gambler of everywhere and nowhere, riding the rails from play to play, a big chaw of licorice in his teeth. See Riding the rails with Licorice Petey.

Motherflusher: Mrs. Flusher’s mom.

Official Royal Flusher Business Card version 1.0: The original highly coveted business card.

Flusher business card strategically hidden at Du-par's.
Official Royal Flusher Business Card 2.0: Version two of my highly coveted business card, complete with the Strict Rules of Parlay printed on the back. There are only three ways to get one of these - directly from me in a casino, finding one I’ve hidden in plain sight, or the third way.

Old Iperooski: Imperial Palace Hotel and Casino. Also Inferior Palace. See Dinq.Old Iperooski: Imperial Palace Hotel and Casino. Also Inferior Palace. See Dinq.

Piffles Flusher: My late cousin, who left us unexpectedly not long after he took me flying in Vegas. I miss him every day.

piPhone 3.14: Probably illegal Pacific Rim knock-off of the iPhone that Jimmy Poon got me a deal on after it ‘fell off the back of a shipping container’.
Poonstang: A tricked out Ford Mustang that makes anyone driving it look like a stud.

Polish Royal: Four royal flush cards plus the nine (with apologies to Poles, who are brilliant engineers, and make a great vodka. Try Wyborowa sometime.)

At least it's a straight flush. Can't get much closer to a Royal and not get it.
P.R.O.B.: Prime rib of beef.

Poonstang: A tricked out Ford Mustang that makes anyone driving it look like a stud.

Punishment Cheese, Lunch, Dinner: Sad, watery shrink-wrapped cheese portions that you substitute for a meal because you went degenerate. Can be paired with Emergency Nuts for a Punishment Lunch or Dinner. See Emergency Cheese.

Punishment cheese.
Quads or Die: Double Double Bonus, so named because you can lose quickly if you don’t hit some quads.

Room Camping: The art of staying in a luxury hotel room in a luxury hotel and bringing your own food, liquor, and snacks. Bonus points for heating a can of chili under the hot water in the sink.

Savvy: Extremely smart, informed, successful, blind lucky, and in complete control. What Royal Flusher is when he’s not degenerate. “Got dealt Aces kicker!!!!” “Savvy play.”

Sheila: Australian slang for woman. Used inappropriately in the blog to refer to almost anyone in a service job. “Did you see the Check-in Sheila? She’s hot!” “I told the Valet Sheila to keep the car nearby.”

Shit Hand: see RAZGU. Also a hand with King Ace King Ace in it.

Strict Rules of Parlay: Savvy money management technique based on doubling the denomination when winning and video poker credits have doubled, and halving the denomination when losing.

Smug Nugget: Golden Nugget Hotel and Casino.

Tang: Jimmy Poon’s cat.

Tilt: Angry, desperate gambling with increased stakes, increased speed, no self-control, throwing good money after bad trying to force a win. See Degenerate. “I went on tilt, popping in hundred dollar bills and blowing through them on 50 cent Double Double.” “Not very savvy.”

TITO: Ticket you get when you cash out of a machine. From Ticket In Ticket Out. Very rare, and almost always worth less than you put in to the machine.

Trop: Tropicana Hotel and Casino.

Walk of Shame: Having to make a trip to the safe in your room, an ATM, or the casino cage to get more gambling funds because you are a fucking degenerate.

Walkabout: Walking between and around in various casinos, possibly making short stops at each one to drop a twenty, but mostly looking at things. “I went on walkabout from the Mirage all the way to Mandalay Bay.”

Washing machine: A non-volatile slot with good payback. Play a dollar, get back a dollar.

Wounded Man’s Hand: Two Aces and a pair of Sevens. See Dead Man's Hand.

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